A
female
age
36-40,
Faybelline
writes:I think Samuel Johnson's words, although two hundred or so years old, are relevant to a lot of the questions and articles on this site; particularly the bit about trust.I have read so many questions from people asking if their boyfriend/girlfriend will cheat again, has cheated or is going to cheat in the future; it's a common worry and an understandable one, but I think sometimes it can be almost obsessed over to the point that the lack of trust ruins a perfectly good relationship.Don't get me wrong, I am totally sympathetic and understand comletely why people worry as the do but, as the quote states, it IS sometimes better to be cheated than not to trust; how many times do you see people or read about people on here who are hurting themselves, mentally, because they don't, or aren't sure whether they can, trust their partner? The pain they put themselves through is often a lot worse than what they would probably feel if they were actually cheated on.I think that what Johnson's words can teach us is that we all need to try and take on a more positive attitude towards certain situations. Rather than focusing on the negative side of things and that someone has done us wrong or may do us wrong nd wondering if there's anything we could do, we should try to look at the positive aspect. The positive aspect being that we actually gave this person love and trust and acted as decent human beings and it is not us that should feel bad, it is the person that wronged us. Reply to this Article
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female
reader, MadonnaMarlton  +, writes (7 November 2008):
I was cheated on after 13 years of marriage and since finding out about the affair... my life has never been the same. The personal heartache that comes through the realization that we are separate and not joined (as I believed we should have been via the marriage vow) sent me into a huge tailspin.Your words are wise and I take them to heart. I'd rather be the fool with a childlike heart than corrupt. I will endeavor to value my childlike heart and fight to keep it. And... more importantly, be cognizant of the value that holds. I may have been made a fool of by someone who though it okay to lie and use. But there is some joy to be found in realizing that even though I was in the same crappy relationship I weathered the storm. And, held true to my word.Thank you for helping me to see the silver lining in something that I could only find clouds in.
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