A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hi i`m 24 yrs old and i`ve been seeing someone for nine yrs now,my problem it`s that everytime we have sex my boyfriend would go straight inside me without making a foreplay or kissing me u know,and i dont enjoy having sex with him,i dont know if maybe i should tell him not to rush i`m scared if i tell him he`ll be upset what do u guys think i should do? pleas help i need your advice on this one.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Boredatwork  +, writes (9 October 2008):
 Just be open with him, you have been together 9 years, so it must be a serious relationship, and in my opinion he won't overreact to this (maybe a little bit confisued as to why you haven't mentioned it before though).Tell him what feels good/makes you happy etc... I don't mind being directed, I'd rather know I was doing somthing right and that my partner was enjoying it.Or..... Depending on how open you are/what type of person you are, maybe start touching youself and ask him to join in saying "this feels nice, but I prefer your hand/tongue there" (if a girl did this to me, I definitely wouldn't be complaining) etc... then when he is let him know your enjoying it, if you, then he is sure to be :) Doing it this way stops you from having to bring it up in conversation.
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