A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Hi...I have a situation that I don't know how to turn it around.I'm currently in a long distance relationship. I'm in a different country then my girl. I have been away from her for close to 7 months now. We would video chat almost everyday ever since. Recently I notice that she doesn't have that "love fire" anymore. There are few hints that I notice she lost the fire. When we talk on the phone, she doesn't ask for me to stay on the phone till she fall asleep. She doesn't text me randomly saying "I miss you a lot!" anymore. There are many other things. The worst part of all is i'm coming home in lass then 2 weeks. My questions is, how do i get her back? Is there anyway for me to restore her "fire"? Did loose her already or should i just wait and see what happens when i come back? With that though, i'm afraid that if i wait that long her "fire" will be completely out.Thanks for your answers
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2009): play hard to get, pretend u losing interest too, its bound to work, girls always want what they cant have
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your answers...I guess i'll txt her and wait. I just hoping now that she haven't found someone else and not telling about it.
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A
female
reader, TheAgonyAunt +, writes (27 June 2009):
You have to remember that inicial spark in a relationship doesn't last forever, you have to have more than a 'spark' to make it work. Why don't you text her something sweet or next time you see her go and do something fun that you havent done before or a romantic evening might do the trick :)Hope this helps =)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2009): long distance relationships are difficult for many people, people need to spend time together to keep the fire alive. maybe the intimacy between you two is too far and wide apart and she feels lonely? if you are losing her, i doubt very much its to do with her not feeling for you, but more to do with the fact she needs someone who is there with her.
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A
male
reader, Your friend +, writes (27 June 2009):
There is nothing you can do until she gets back when you meet you will see if her spark for you is still there. I am surprised you two have been able to keep a distance relationship going for so long. If anything has changed it would be hard to blame her but wait and see first, you could just be experiencing some anxiety because she is returning.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2009): You did not lose her already. In these two weeks, you should use it as time to send her sweet messages, about how excited you are to see her, how you can't wait to hold her, how much you have missed her! Give something to her when you get there, that will be very meaningful to her, and make sure you include a handwritten letter, explaining to her how happy you have been with her, and she makes you, even when you are so far away. That you need her, and don't know what you would have done without her love and support. The truth, she may be getting nervous to see you again. She is not sure how you will look, if things will be the same and she is waiting to see how it will be... and/or she is relieved you are coming home, and is not expressing that "hot fire" because she is so tired, anxious inside, and so happy inside to see you again...that she figures she will wait until you get there. It is hard to keep expressing the same "love fire" to someone you havent seen in person for that long, you become unsure, and feel as though you are somewhat estranged. But, that does not mean you cannot reconnect with her again the minute you step off the plane! Run and wrap her in your arms. Show her, that night, that she is still your love and only desire :) (and restore that "fire")
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A
female
reader, That Fragile Capricorn +, writes (27 June 2009):
Well, I wouldn't give up on it. There could be something going on in her personal life. You should just randomly check on her, casually make sure she's okay and just do random thoughtful things for her while your away. Send flowers, or send a random text saying "i miss you so much" or something of the sort until you see her. Just let her know your making an effort to make her feel special. Then, when you get there, plan a special evening just for you and her. Something romantic like a candle lit dinner on the beach or take her to a place that has a sentimental meaning to you guys. I'm sure you can think of something (:Just remind her how much you mean to her, girls like to be reminded of this.Good luck.
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A
female
reader, laura585 +, writes (27 June 2009):
It's possible that she's just adjusted to life without you around, it doesnt mean she loves you any less - just that shes accepted the fact that you are not there and no matter how many times she tells u she misses you, you are still not there. The only spark she might need to reignite her fire may just be seeing you in person again. Afterall, you dont want her to be miserable and in a constant state of lonliness because your not there, do you? Be happy that shes a healthy girl who can deal with the ups and downs of a long distance relationship. I bet it will be fireworks when you see her in person. If not, well... I dont have a pessimistic answer or advice to give if her love did just burn out. So be optimistic!
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