A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hiii....iam in a relationship from past 1 year....my girlfriend told me a few months back that she has lost her verginity to his ex-boyfriend..they had a realtionship of 4 years..i love her a lott n cant think of my life without her.but at the same time this truth bothers me a lott. i was a vergin when i met her.iam really confused whether should i continue with her or not.from love point of view i dont have any problem with her.she gives me time,,,supports me n do evry best possible thing she can to keep me happy n satisfied.but that thought keeps my mind very unstable.what to do i dnt know.how to accept it or should i leave her?????
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 December 2010): If he could forget her past then he would never have asked the question. That's not how retrogade jealousy works. It's not a choice.
A
female
reader, bhawna +, writes (8 December 2010):
forget her past she loves u thats why she confess it if she hides this from you then also u loved her but she tells u the truth so fogive her and move on
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2010): if you love where you are in life, then why waste time and energy hating where you have been? If you fell down a mountain, tumbled into a ravine and down a waterfall, spilling into a beautiful valley full of lush fruits, vegetation, adoring friends and loved ones, then why curse the trip that brought you to paradise?
This is something my aunt sent me after dealing with similar issues with my boyfriend. She didn't know about my problems but she saw it in a book and sent it to me in an email. I am still happily with my boyfriend, and I know that we will be very happy in the future because I make the concious effort to be with him as I am and as he is today, not how we were yesterday or a year or two years ago.
I hope that quote helps you as much as it helps me. Say it to yourself, or remember that when you need a pick-up. It may bother you off and on but remember to keep things in perspective. All you have is now. Tomorrow is not guaranteed, and I'm betting if you knew you didn't have tomorrow, you wouldn't waste today worrying about his past, you'd be ENJOYING it with him! Do everyone a favor, listen to the majority when they say that it is in the past and it doesn't matter. Let it be the past, and live your wonderful life today!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2010): If you love her then you won't mind her past. Or if you love her then her past may hurt you very much. It depends on the person. Nobody else has the right to tell you how you are supposed to feel about it or tell you why you feel the way you do.
She is who she is, it's not going to change. If you just try to forget about it and hope time will ease the pain then you are setting yourself up for trouble. Your hurt feelings will probably never fade on their own. You need to find a way to deal with it or else you need to break up with her and find someone else whose past fits what you are looking for.
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A
female
reader, largentsgirl89  +, writes (28 November 2010):
 Would you rather be her first? Or her last?
SHe is with you now and there is a reason that she isn't with her ex boyfriend anymore. They were together for four years, you need to accept her past and move on to the future together.
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A
male
reader, VJay  +, writes (28 November 2010):
 Yeah. That happened in the past and now, she's with you. You two are together. Thats what important. If you really love her, you'll accept her just the way she is. You dont just leave her. No matter whether she's still a virgin or not.
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A
female
reader, lacrymosa_652  +, writes (28 November 2010):
 Just keep in mind that she's with you now, and whatever happened in the past with her ex doesn't matter. The older you get, the less likely you're going to be somebody's first relationship, first kiss, first love, first lover etc. Don't think too much about her past. He's her ex for a reason. What matters now is what the two of you have in the present. Don't lose someone you love because you're hung up on her past.. she's with you now and that's all that matters.
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