A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Me and my girlfriend have done some light petting and have decided to try oral next time we hang out. She's gone that far with other guys where I have not. We were talking about how we didn't dirty talk over text and she said it was because I was so sweet and she felt like I was innocent. I guess I'm more innocent than her but by no means am I innocent. The other guys she dated were very sexual and talked sexually a lot. I'm more of a sweet and gentleman-like flirter. I guess I'm more old fashioned than dirty. I enjoy talking dirty though and don't want her thinking I'm innocent. It bothers me..
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 August 2013): It would bother any normal guy in your shoes. It feels totally wrong knowing you are not the "naughty" guy for her and somebody else has been. It is one of those things women don't seem to get about men. Even a "gentleman" wants to feel like he can bring out the most naughty side of his GF. It feels terrible thinking that she could have indulged the naughty side of herself with someone else but she does not have this kind of relationship with you. My advice is talk to your GF. She probably does not understand how this is affecting you. Let her know that it feels like she can indulge that side of her sexuality with someone else but she does not see you in that way at all. She should understand how that would hurt a person. Its not about comparing to everyone else. You want to feel like you have a complete sexual relationship with her.
A
female
reader, Soul Writer +, writes (20 August 2013):
 Let's see...I am unsure of what exactly the problem is here. Are you sorry for being a more of a "sweet, gentleman-type"? If I were in your shoes, I would be very proud of that! Each relationship has different boundaries. It is your duty, as well as that of your girlfriend's, to set those boundaries. Speak with her. Figure out what it is you want...and what you want to be known as. This isn't a competition by any means. Nobody is innocent. However, some have better manners and composure than others. Just because you are "innocent" doesn't mean you are inexperienced.
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