A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:hi dear aunts, I recently broke up with my LDR because I couldn't stand the distance anymore. I'm sorry. I'm not just cut out for it. I have been having a hard time getting dates lately. I'm not into the bar/club scene anymore, I don't want to date young girls anymore, I'd like somebody around my age. I tried online dating without any success. girls just don't reply my messages. I'm average looking though not bad looking and from time to time girls check me out. I'm fit and funny but kind of shy. Do you have any suggestion of where is a good place to look for girls other than clubs, bars or online? in the city where I live is difficult to get a serious date, its all about having fun.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2013): THE LIBRARY!!! there you will find hopeless romantic nerdy girls who want love desperately. very romantic, sweet, and SUPER SMART!!!! Seriously, these types of girls are not in for your money and gifts, and most not all of them wil probably do anything to make you happy!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2013): Get involved in activities like volunteer work or sports, this way you can meet people in a social setting and get to know them in a low key way NOT in a setting where it is all about partnering up or hooking up. To me its much more natural this way and not creepy.I don't know if my advice is good though. All my relationships started when I wasn't seeking a relationship but just serendipitously with guys I already knew as friends. I have never been specifically on the prowl for a relationship so if you are I don't know where you would find one on purpose other than online dating or bars since it only makes sense that if you have a goal to partner up or hook up then you should go to where there's people there for the same reason. That would maximize your chance of success by being in the same place with others seeking the same thing as you, would it not?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2013): I met my boyfriend in the gym! It works because he is into the same hobbies as me. we don't drink all that much - and I'm Irish so thats saying something! I do classes in strength training and weightlifting and there is a good mix of men and women and good crack! The breaks between sets allow you the chance to strike up a conversation. Now we are "boring" (my friends drink and party alot - 30yrs old!) together :-)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2013): Personally, I made the most friends by joining a local amateur dramatics society because it allows you to meet new people and you work together on a project. This means that you can develop a friendship over time and really get to know someone before you ask them out.You don't have to be able to act - they will always need members who run the backstage area of things such as lighting, sound effects, set construction, stage management etc (although it does help if you can/want to act as you would meet more women this way - women tend to join theatre companies to act rather than build sets!)In "Am dram" companies there are usually far more women than men so you would have a slight advantage. Don't be disheartened if you don't meet the "right women" straight away. You will still be widening your circle of friends which can lead to other friendships - married people may have single sisters and older members may well have daughters and nieces who are dateable.If you want to consider this option look for a company that has a fairly large membership (at least 50 members) and that puts on several productions a year (at least 4 plays) to ensure that you get to meet and work with as many people as possible.Also look for a company that plans regular get-togethers or activities with its members.Good luck
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A
male
reader, kenny  + ♥, writes (15 August 2013):
 Bars and clubs are not the best places to meet people anyway. Internet dating will probally get mixed opinions, personally i think its more people not replying to your messages and playing games, as you have experienced. I think you are best to go to places where you have a common interest with someone. An evening class, a course, adventure weekends, the gym. I have just met a lovely girl at my gym and we get along brilliantly, its early days but the signs are looking good. I go and push weights, she goes to do a class, then we meet for a drink after, its great. Invarible we meet our potential partner's when we stop looking and relax about the whole meeting someone thing. It will happen, just relax about the when and the how's, and it will happen when you very least expect it.
good luck
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