A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Is this true love? Me and my girlfriend have been together for 9 months, but just recently we broke up. I felt sick and she said that she cried a lot. I know I want her back, but I have the feeling that I should let her go and live her life and let me live mine. I also hope that one day we'll both be mature enough to be in a long and committed relationship. She said that she'll always love me and need me in her life. Is this just the end of infatuation or really true love?
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): yea if the reason of ur breaking up wasnt very big i suggest u stay together. what was the reason that u broke up anyways? the kind of relationship you have now is gonna determine the type of relationships you have later.. so dont hurt her, and try to stay together. if the reason was something u cant overlook then u shud break up. to know if its true love then u need to wait and see if ur feelings subside...
A
male
reader, Kenj  +, writes (10 August 2010):
 If you both want to be with each other and make each other happy then stay, if you let her go then you may end up regreting it later.
You could also break up and stay friends.
Time apart can often bring a relationship closer because of the thinking time allowed.
Its perfectly normal to feel down or cry after a break up but you do get over it given time.
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A
male
reader, Nor3d3mption +, writes (10 August 2010):
Honestly, its very hard thinking if you still love someone after a break-up, especially one that was after a long relationship. My ex broke up with me after 4 and a half years.. I was buying the ring the day she broke it off. In my case i found out that I was in love, but she wasn't ready to be committed.. Even after 4 years, i was fooled.
The toughest part of my story, is that 2 weeks later, she asked me back and i told her no because i needed a mature mate who was actually interested in companionship.
In the end, its a feeling you get when you look in their eyes.. You'll know exactly what im talking about when you feel it. no one can explain it cause its different for each person.
weather you meet up again in the future, or never see eachother again.. they will always be in your mind because even if you shared a small and quick lived bond, its still a bond that lasts a very long time.
GOOD LUCK
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A
female
reader, Velvet +, writes (10 August 2010):
At that age, it is not true love. It's puppy love.
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A
male
reader, WYCowboy  +, writes (10 August 2010):
Its hard to tell in this situation. I broke up with my fiance after 5 months of being engaged. She couldnt trust me and often lied to me. But even after all she put me threw I still love her and we've talked about getting back together. The thing you have to think about is that typically the problems you had before are still gonna be there. What you have to decide for yourself is are the problems and issues worth it? are they something you can work threw together or change? I know how it feels to lay in bed at night and miss someone so much all you can do is lay there and cry but you have to consider what is the best for you and for her. hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, Oregongrl1 +, writes (10 August 2010):
Make your mind up? can't say you really like someone hurt her then turn her off like a light switch?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): I have a long term boyfriend and I'm about your age. We broke up at 5 months and I think once again close to 9 months. And we always got back together. But even still I kept on asking myself if this was really meant to be, I had the same feelings that you had about thinking I should let him go, but at the end of the day he always convinced me to stay with him. If you both are crying and you both want each other back, you should give it another shot. If it was a fight that broke you two up you can get over it. If it was taking the relationship further I reccomend staying together but taking a break (hanging out with friends a little more to relieve some stress). Just be honest with each. Sometimes relationships plateau for awhile but how will you ever figure out how good you have it if you never let it live out. Just live and let live.
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A
female
reader, OhGetReal +, writes (10 August 2010):
 I know you will hate to hear this but at your age it isn't true love. You know nothing of real love between a man and a woman because you are still children. Mostly what you are feeling is dependance and attachment, which are important developmental stages to learning about love. I am sure that you have some real affection for each other, but you are way too young to be in a serious long term relationship because right now at your ages this is just a burden. You are at a time in your life when you are trying to transition from being a dependent child to a very young adult and you will go through a lot of emotional changes. Your hormones are going to make you feel things more intensely, but don't confuse intensity for love.
I don't think I am helping you much because most of what you are going to learn comes through life experience not from me telling you what is what.
But for now, it is in your best interests to go your seperate ways and to have many friends of the opposite sex and same sex without getting to heavy into any one person, it isn't the right time to do that. Enjoy being free and single and exploring an experiencing life. You don't know who you are yet and true love is between two whole fully developed adults who can stand on their own and can create something more than they can do on their own, like a family and a purposeful life. You aren't at a place in your development or life to do that, make sense?
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