A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hello :)my boyfriend and I have only been together for about 5 months and things were obviously great in the begining.. but not as much anymore. I don't tell him this yet but I do love him. Things are starting to seem a little complicated now tho.. before I got with this boyfriend I was with my ex for four years on and off and we had the best sex ever.. my new boyfriend hardly ever wants to do it and it's starting to make me miss the sex with my ex. My ex was a complete jerk and treated me horribly, all my friends and family absolutely hate him. I keep having urges to call my ex just for sex..but I know it will end up leading to more than that and I really don't want to hurt my relationship with my new boyfriend (even though he has been not treating me to well either lately.)I don't know what to do, I just want good sex like I used to have! any advise will help...Thank you!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): I don't think it's all about sex.....I think you may still have some lingering feelings for your ex. If the ONLY thing that is lacking in the relationship is great sex, why then would you want to risk all of that by having sex with your ex? A guy who didn't love you, a guy who treated your body as a garbage can, a guy who was a jerk..why???? The fact that you are thinking this way tells, me that you are immature, you do not know enough about what a healthy relationship is, you don't know what it takes to build a successful long term relationship and you don't appreciate the good things in life.
You can do what you want, but always remember that what every you sow, that too shall you reap...regardless of age.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you everybody I really appreciate it, I've been staying strong and reminding myself why I shouldn't call my ex.. I just talked to my boyfriend about how it makes me feel kinda bad about myself and not sexy when he never wants to do it,didn't really get me anywhere but I guess I'll keep trying. maybe I'll get some sexy lingerie and light some candles or something..that might change his mind ;)
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A
male
reader, WYCowboy +, writes (10 August 2010):
I think my fiance felt the same way about me. She wanted to have sex alot and I really didnt. This might sound odd to you and it does to alot of guys until they expierence it. As a guy you think all you ever want is sex until thats all you have and then its not as good. Take time to just cuddle up and spend time together. I guarantee if you get to know each other better and fall deeper in love with each other, the sex you have then will be like none other
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A
female
reader, Oregongrl1 +, writes (10 August 2010):
Yea go single and play the field! if that's all you want out of a relationship! it's not just about SEX, and you might really care for him and just to young to realize it or he might not be the one!
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A
male
reader, Was +, writes (10 August 2010):
Well Sweet-Thing is right theres more to a relationship then sex, it is fantastic. But just ask him and try to work things out.
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A
female
reader, Sweet-thing +, writes (10 August 2010):
I have the same problem! My b/f hardly ever wants sex, and sometimes I think it's me -- maybe I'm just not sexy to him. Who knows, but it all comes down to this: Are you compatible to make this relationship work?....If sex if really imporant, you should re-evaluate this relationship carefully. You're too young to get locked into a relationship that's missing something that important. As for me? I'm much older, and we have lot of other things in common, and frankly I'm too lazy to find someone else. Pathetic? Yes, but only if I were your age.
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A
female
reader, luvingme21 +, writes (10 August 2010):
I know its REALLY HARD..TRUST ME I KNOW, but sex isn't everything. Maybe you and your current boyfriend should try foreplay or something. It sounds like you and your curent boyfriend don't have sex much.or do you? Don't go back to your ex, he was only good for sex and that's all.
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