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male
age
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anonymous
writes:I have been friends with a lady work colleague for a few months and we got on very well, however we have now moved apart and now work on opposite sides of town. She went on holiday and I sent 1 message to her on Facebook, a month ago, to which there has been no reply. On her return I sent her another e mail- two weeks ago, again, silence, not even a message to say thanks or that she had a good holiday.I would like to know, what is the rationale behind the silent treatment - is this the old 'if i ignore him enough he will go away theory? If you were the lady and decided you no longer wanted to be friends, would this be the method you would use? As far as I am aware i have given her no reason to no longer want to be friends, but if so, would like to rectify the issue.Picking up the phone and talking to her is not really an option, for fear of sounding desperate..
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks deirdre11! :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2011): Well time will tell if she goes back to her own ways. But as soon as she plays up again, I think that really would be it for me though if I was in your situation.
You're right to give her a second chance though, at least you won't be wondering what if?! and if it doesnt work out well at least you can say you gave her a chance.
I really hope she is genuine this time and knows what she wants.
I hope it works out for you.
Good Luck.x
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell a month later and there's been no forgetting her at all. I'm back working in the same building as her- She never did say why she didnt bother to reply to any of my messages- when I mentioned them to her she seemed happy enough to have received them, but for some reason it didnt seem to even occur to her to reply. We still see each other occasionally at work and she's even quite enthusiastic in her greetings when paths (rarely) do cross.
We've even exchanged work emails since as well...(and reply's were even received- wonders never cease) - maybe she felt guilty...
I guess I'm happy with this outcome, as it would have been a shame to have loft contact all together..
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI agree- silly me i tried but she wasnt there anyway.
Three strikes and you're out!
Now the hard part of trying to forget her...
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (26 May 2011):
 Most probably she won't say what the matter is. I would just avoid her.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey everyone, thanks for your comments. Its all a bit of a mystery really how one can go on holiday for a few weeks and have a complete turnaround in their views on you, as we got on so well before then. Maybe she is having issues, I will find out the truth soon enough shortly, as I have to visit the building in which she works.. I may just have to 'pop my head around the corner' and say hello, just to find out the truth once and for all! :)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2011): Yes I think she's not interested in you. Either that or she's got a lot of personal issues that are taking up all her time and attention (like maybe health problems, financial woes etc). But if so, that also equates to not being interested in you either.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 May 2011): Yes unfortunately she is not interested anymore, some people do this rather that tell the person straight out. It is a cowardly way of rejection and I think it is cold and more hurtful that telling the person straight out, it only prolongs the hurt.
My advice is to forget about this woman and cut all contact with her, even if she does contact you now. Her actions at present show that she is not that interested in keeping contact with you and you need to move on for your own sake.
Good Luck.x
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male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (25 May 2011):
I say, let go of her. The silent treatment may be that she's busy, or whatever, but I believe that women who are interested in you do send you messages and do find a way to keep in touch.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI forgot to mention that something like this happened to me once before, whereby I spent quite a while over a few weeks with a girl and we went out for dinner and had a good time. We lived in different countries but I just wanted to keep in contact. After emailing her three times over 2 or 3 weeks, I gave up- that was 3 years ago. I refuse to attempt to contact her again in writing as do not want a repeat of this situation- looks like I am going to get it anyway..
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