A
male
age
36-40,
*rOveranalysing
writes:So I met this guy, we hooked up, he refused to kiss because he said he was in love with his best friend in another country, who was also in a relationship. He said he wouldn’t kiss because he felt like he was betraying his best friend (!!!!). Alarm bells slightly went off at this point because (a) he is hung up on someone; (b) he is hung up over someone who isn’t even into him/unavailable to him or probably both. There was an odd vibe during hook up, he was withdrawn and wary all the time. But I didn’t read too far into it. At the end, he insisted we must meet again and I seemed like a nice guy etc. So I said ”cool, whats your name I’ll add you on fb” he unflinichingly added his name in. My logic being, even if this doesn’t go anywhere, I can make a casual friend. An hour later he accept request and that’s that. Half an hour after that I notice I’ve been unfriended :S I figure its odd so I re-add him (maybe a bit stalkey?), but it didn’t add up, he had made overtures about meeting up again. The next morning he accept my friend request again. The next day I get a whats app saying “hi how r u”, I think this is a nice friendly message, I respond then he stops responding but has read messages. I then log on on fb and notice I’ve been deleted yet again. Now obviously I wont re-add him, but how should I be reading this situation? Sounds like a very confused guy with a lot of mixed signals and not much sense of his own awkwardness. Or is it me that overstepped a boundary?
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male
reader, jc2008 +, writes (22 November 2013):
I've met a few like this in the past. They do blow hot and cold and make no sense. To be honest, they never will. I know it is easy to take this personally but at the end of the day you have a life to lead. I would walk away and leave it at that.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2013): He's a total dingaling. You don't need to go back and forth with Daffy Duck. He is having a delusional fixation on someone, and that's a red-flag. I wouldn't really waste time being a friend; because you'll spend a lot of time lost in the fog behind this guy.This is a justifiable one-night stand. It almost sounds like he's sneaking out, and doesn't want to get caught. H-m-m-m-m!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (22 November 2013):
 YIKES walk away this guy has drama-llama written all over him.
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (22 November 2013):
 You read it to mean he's extremely shady and walk away. It was a one-time hook up and that was it.
I highly doubt he's got a best friend who he likes in another country. More like he probably has a boyfriend in another country who would wonder who you were if you posted on his fb page. So to hide this, he accepted you to make himself look legit and humor you, then deleted you in the hopes you wouldn't notice. Then accepted you again, and deleted you again, once again hoping you wouldn't notice.
He is hiding you from someone. Probably a relationship. just drop him. he's a shady guy and a waste of your time.
Also, he would sleep with you but not kiss you?? Last I checked, sex was cheating lol. What an odd thought process.
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