A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok, so the deal is I have a friend who is possibly a flip flopper. She has been diagnosed with depression which may hide everything in plain sight. She has moved to London over a year ago which she admitted it sucked for her because she had to re-adjust under high pressure.She has called time on our friendship at least two to three times and has come back with tail between legs grovelling each and every time wanting to make amends to rebuild friendship. She has also said she values me, but I believe she is a person of integrity. These incidents have happened ever since she made the move to London.She has recently said to me she cannot say a word about why she cannot come home to Wales this month until the dust settles which is quite ambiguous. I do not want our friendship to become one big walking circumstance. I am not going to deny/minimise anything and I would greatly appreciate honest feedback :)Thank-you guys Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (20 January 2017):
 How much do you actually rely on this girl for friendship? If it is to any great extent, then I think you need to distance yourself a little and just (if you wish) be friends on her terms (i.e. occasionally, when she is able).
If she has true depression, she will have bad times when she wants nothing to do with others and just needs to be alone. These will be the times she will be most likely to call off your friendship. No idea why someone would feel a need to do that - most of us just stay away for a while - unless it is for the dramatic effect. It is possible she thrives on the ups and downs of ending relationships and then re-igniting them again. Don't get caught up in her drama. Make new friends. See her if she is able to see you but don't rely on her to any great extent. That way her ups and downs won't have as much effect on you as they would otherwise.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2017): Most people find the prospect of moving from a smaller town to a sprawling metropolis like London quite daunting at first as it takes time to establish a new circle of friends and social contacts.
I dont particularly see your friendship going far with this person because you havent understood why she moved away or taken onboard the difficulties she's faced while your life has comfortably ticked on.
'Crawling back to you' doesnt exactly sound like an empathetic
relationship!.
In fact it makes you sound as if you are smugly superior in your assessment of your situation versus hers.
Apart from that distance doesnt lend itself to a better relationship.
It would be different if you battled it out together, both making the move together.
I feel you are waiting for her to fail but you are also aware that her life moves forward at a rapid pace.
I dont sense that you are close.?
I feel you are an old friend she likes to catch up with now and again but not necessarily a future partner.
If this is the case you may as well pay attention to some of the many pretty girls around you as you might be wanting to date someone local in the future with a view to enhancing your life.
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