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Is this accpetable behavior from a husband?

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Question - (7 July 2011) 8 Answers - (Newest, 11 July 2011)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

On June 30th my husband recieved a text message from a number he didn't know. It was obviously a teenage girl stating she "loves Logan". So he wrote back, "You have the wrong number". She then wrote "No I do not". In which he stated he was just going to ignore it. So I go on the account today and see that on July 3rd, while I was at work between the 8:44 pm to 10:00 pm, my husband texted this number off and on a total of 48 times (that being 24 times each). SO I called my husband about it and told him what the hell was he doing, he said that she started texting and he spent the whole time trying to tell her she had the wrong number. ( I did see where she initiated the texting). However, would you find this acceptable behavior from your spouse?

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A female reader, Sandy0113 United States +, writes (11 July 2011):

Sandy0113 agony auntNo it is not acceptable behavior! Ask him to see the texts where they texted back in forth, if he doesn't want you too or has deleted them he is obviously hiding something! If i was you i would check up on his phone all the time when he's asleep or just act normal and be like "oh i cant find my phone i need to call so and so can i borrow yours?" and look through it til you find what you're looking for but please do not act hysterical this will only lead him to be more careful about deleting the texts and her texting him and will only make it harder for you to find out what's going on!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2011):

Yep I forgot about the code sms. Meaning lovers "test"to see if the coast is clear.

Sounds all the more intriguing now.

Op , you get the number and pretend you are your hb. Do it when u know he is at home/nearby so that the other person will be clueless that it is not him. (Do not text away while he is not around bec u don't know where he can be)

LoveGirl

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2011):

Who knows.

A woman calls me periodically on my cell phone. Her phone number is just one digit off mine, and I assume she is calling her voice mail.

Thank god she sounds like she is 80 years old, and isn't some young chick. She's gotten better but it still happens.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2011):

hahaha, it may have been a "wrong" number BUT he kept contact becuase he wanted to see where it would lead.

meaning: he was angling for more..........

watch him: he is not as "innocent" as he appears. he seemed to get off witht he playful banter, the inncoent flirt?????

LoveGirl

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A female reader, k_c100 United Kingdom +, writes (7 July 2011):

k_c100 agony auntIf I were you I would not believe that he sent 24 texts, all telling her she had the wrong number! He would have given up telling her this after 10 texts at the most, not 24! There is only so many times you can say "you have the wrong number".

If I were you I would ask to see the texts - if he has deleted them this is a clear sign he has something to hide. But you are right to be worried about this, this is not normal and you should talk to him about it.

I hope this helps and good luck!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2011):

24 times texting back and forth does sound suspicious. he could have simply just stopped responding. he was clearly carrying on a conversation with her. and I doubt they were talking about the weather or politics.

and the fact that he didn't mention it to you until you confronted him about it is also suspicious.

so, no I don't find this acceptable at all.

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A female reader, sammy1986 United Kingdom +, writes (7 July 2011):

i would call the number when your husband is out and ask who it is its the only way you will find out the truth good luck

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A male reader, Odds United States +, writes (7 July 2011):

Odds agony aunt24 texts is an awful lot. Can you see the texts?

Be warned, he may have deleted them if he's up to no good... or he may have deleted them if he's innocent, in a misguided attempt to avoid suspicion. Sometimes it's hard to see the best way to handle one of these things.

You can call the number and tell her to cease and desist, to stop harassing you. That just leaves his behavior. I think 24 texts is unacceptable, even if he was honestly spending that much time trying to shut her up (maybe he was bored). Talk to him, ask for specifics. Remain calm; if you go into it looking for a fight (or if he *thinks* you're looking for one, so be aware of how you present yourself), you'll only make it harder to figure things out. In any event, make it clear you don't find it acceptable for him to text back and forth like that.

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