A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I have a boyfriend and we've been with each other for just over 7 months now. We've been having oral sex for a little while now as I'm not really ready for sex yet and he's fine with that. But, the problem is when he gives me oral sex I don't tend to feel much I love my bf to bits and don't want to upset him so I haven't told him and I can't really tell him what I like because I've never been into touching myself, but I tried a few times, but still I felt nothing, could there be something wrong with me?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2009): Don't do it because you want to make him happy. Do it because you want to. When I first started having sex - oral, intercourse - sure it felt strange and not ecstatic, mildly pleasant maybe, but just weird... But I wanted to do it. There was eagerness in it. And when it got better it was such fun. And my (more experienced) boyfriend was a part of the whole journey. I would tell him exactly what happened to me and how it felt and the wonder of it all. He would shake his head at how I never said it was earthshattering and would tease me but there was honesty. But hell, I would have never gone that way to please someone else. If you don't like it don't do it.Chances are you want to explore but you are pinning it on him. Explore. And understand. And talk about it with the person you are intimate with. Or it could be that you, as you say, want to make him happy. Thumbs down to that.
A
male
reader, Candleman  +, writes (10 October 2009):
 Most likely its the inexperience of your boyfriend and your inexperience and shyness of telling him what you want. Now, since you don't really know what you want, then you have to experiment. That's the fun part. Now, keep in mind that there are different things that you can do to him while performing oral sex. He's obviously not having a problem feeling anything, but you can always enhance his pleasure. Tell your bf that you want to experiment doing different things w/ oral sex for you two to gain experience. This then opens the idea of mutual sharing and exploring and doesn't make him feel bad. I'm giving you two links. The first is on blow jobs and I didn't really search too far for this. It's not porn and what little I read is good. You can probably find better ones.http://www.allsexguide.com/oral_sex_male.htm The other site is the best female site I have ever found. http://www.the-clitoris.com/f_html/fr_index.htm On this site there are sections that deal w/ masturbation which you should read and learn to explore your own body to find areas that stimulate you the most. Oral sex is different though and it is something that you will have to guide him as he is doing it to say what is working and what is not working. I think all guys should read this site. Get him interested in it and hopefully he will read it. Just remember to relax and have a fun w/ this. Stress can easily kill the pleasure. That should get you started. Enjoy.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (10 October 2009):
 Nothing wrong, and you are still way too young to worry about such things. Please trust me that most everyone has troubles and doubts all along the way in life, but especially throughout the teens and early 20s. I remember.
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A
female
reader, OmShantih +, writes (10 October 2009):
 There is absolutley nothing wrong with you!
Different people enjoy sex to different degree's. Your young and inexperienced. I imagine the whole thing is still pretty stressful and uncomfortable for you!
My advice is to experiment on yourself and then you know exactly what to get him to do, Dont be afraid to tell him what you like - if anything this will excite him more. You have nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about, all of this is perfectly natural, its all personal preferences!
Stop putting so much pressure on yourself, just try to relax and enjoy it. It sounds like you have a decent boyfriend who is willing to wait for you, so dont worry about hurting his feelings.
Enjoy safe sex!
Love and Light
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