A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've been in a relationship for two years, on two occasions the guy I'm with (or was with) has contacted an ex when things have been rough between us and then he doesn't disclose this information, until way later. Last week we were having problems and he mentioned that the ex had contacted him out of the blue. We decided to end things because we'd been arguing a lot lately and he wasn't completely sure he wanted to end things cause he says he loves me. Today I find out that the day after we ended things he contacted his previous ex to see if they could hook up. Does this mean there is no chance we'll get back together? Is he going to have sex with her, or is he just trying to feel desirable? Should I even give him the time of day. Oh yes, the first time we ended things he would call after a few days and say he'd made a mistake. I think it's BS, he shouldn't be contacting exes if he's in a relationship, right? I should just move on and make myself available for the right guy, right?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, babomi  +, writes (11 October 2008):
 old saying : "when a door is closed, a dress is unzipped"
good chances are he just goes to his ex to feel better about himself
but to be sure, give a good assessment to your relationship, is there anything that could suggest he had some involvement elsewhere ?
but if it s not the first time this on and off is happening to the two of you, don t make a pattern out of it, don t let his ex to become the third leg of your story
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