A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Im 18, hes 23.Ive known him for about 9 months now, he was interested in me from the beginning but to be really honest, I wasn't too bothered with taking it further with him but over these 9 months i've gotten to know what he's like and we met up again yesterday after a veryyyy long time.He invited me over to his house, he introduced me to his mother and sister and then we were just in his bedroom.I was on the sofa, he was on the bed and we were talking for about two hours straight.There isn't actually a problem but he's so straight forward and upfront about every single thing.I can tell he likes to communicate and i'm so glad that he does because I do to, if there's something wrong I like to solve it there and then so that it doesn't get to the point where someone is effected by it later down the line and he seems like he does the same just by the way we were talking to each other.His straight forwardness is very different because i'm not experienced, i've never had an official boyfriend but i have been on dates and have gotten to know guys before and they all liked to play silly games and ask disinterested and then show interest again, they'd go by the whole '3 day rule' thing and to be honest, that just doesnt cut it for me, if i like someone, i like them, im not going to let my pride take over and play by some silly unwritten rules.He seems pretty genuine by what i can gather, he did make a move on me but only after asking me first. He said that he'd like to kiss me but he's not sure if and ended up kissing me but he was making sure i was okay with it because he knows im not as experienced as him and he knows i've only kissed one guy before and that was over two years ago so he was asking me if it was alright to carry on, his hands were placed on my waist and then he asked me if it was alright if he moved his hand to the side of my thigh to place it on my hip, even though placing a hand on a hip isn't that big of a deal, he was making sure that i was comfortable with what he was doing and he treated me well when i was at his house.He said he wants to see me again and im willing to meet up with him again.We're very alike, we both hate games, love being blunt and straight forward, we're both random and we like to make jokes, we both have a funny side but can be serious when we have to be.The only thing im truly concerned about is that, is there anything i should be concerned about when a guy is as straight forward as him?I mean, he was communicative and open about his thoughts and what he wanted to say, but at the same time, he's extremely experience, he told me that in his younger days he did move from girl to girl but obviously he's 23 now and im nearly 19 but i still feel as though hes more grown and obviously more mature so i'm not 100% sure as to what i should think about the situation, seeing as im totally inexperienced would anyone like to help?
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (20 September 2011):
 I am not quite sure what exactly you are asking.. there would not seem to be any problem. The guy is 23 and you are 19, not a humongous age difference, and at all of 23 he seems all grown up and mature to you... but, really, he 's not,believe me :), you've got nothing to feel intimidated.
He is a direct, communicative, straightforward type that does not play games, you like that and you are the same type. So, what is it specifically in this scenario that makes you hesitant ?
Is it about sex , maybe ? Do you think he 'll be fast , direct and straightforward about wanting sex too ? Not necessarily a bad thing, as long as he does not pressure you. If you don't feel ready, you don't have to accomodate his timing, it's the other way around. Be as frank and as straightforward too and if you feel it's too soon, just say it clear.
But perhaps I guessed wrong, so if it is something else that bothers you, maybe you could elaborate a bit ?
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