A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey everyone, I am in a big dilema and need your help guys. I am in a relationship with a guy from last 3 years. Things were fine until his family came into the picture. I have been introduced to his family and at first, they liked me. Now things are changing. Recently, his family takes his cell phone so that he can't talk to me. They blame me for every bad thing that my bf goes through, whether it's his ill health or studies. I lost my patience and had an argument with his mother. My bf is a very nice, sensitive guy. I am also very reserved, hyper-sensitive kind of girl, who worries a lot on small small things. My bf tried his best to move out of the house. He even defended me but this has really made both of us crazy. To place everything on the right track, I went to his home and solved everything. I had a word with his mom and dad in front of him, where they have forgiven me but his mom has clearly asked me to stay away from him and stop planning future with him as she isn't going to accept me at any cost because I am from different religion. Even, somehow I also know this relation has no future as my father is a heart patient, I can't even confront him anything and he has no knowledge about it at all. I lost my mother at a very tender age. My brothers and relatives are not going to accept it. Inspite of all these things, we both just can't move on. We tried so many times but failed. His family now threatens me that they will tell my father everything. I am shattered. I promised his mother I will avoid her son. She was happy. Help me what should I do? I love him. :(
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (20 September 2011):
 You know what you should do .You should move on. This is not going to happen. Belonging to a different religion may complicate things everywhere, but in your country it's not just about praying different Gods, it's about different - and clashing- communities, traditions, values, social and cultural identity, everything. If one of you is a Hindu and the other a Muslim, for instance....it's not going to happen.
You know it already because at least his family knows about you, but you have to keep him a secret from yours, otherwise your father could- literally- have a heart attack.
Everything changes in this world, and for things to change of course it takes a few brave people who start challenge prejudice until they eventually defeat it. But, a) it's a very slow process, it may take years and decades and b) your bf does not sound such a brave soul, he lets his mom do the talking for him and extort you promises against your will. He's not going to fight for this, and apparently neither can you, so why wasting any more time.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2011): If you two can manage a healthy and loving relationship, it would be wrong to not be together. Sometimes in life you have to defy people that you'd rather not, but it is for a greater purpose. You have to do what is right. If your father loves you, he will understand. The same goes for his mother. They may not understand right away, but you should stick with it. We fight for love that is real. We teach others what love really is. You have to be okay with doing something that others can't understand. Explain why you care so much about it, and stick with it. Good luck.
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