A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:This might sound a bit random.But, is there any way to see how a man feels for you through the way you have sex?the reason i ask is that when me any my boyfriend first started having sex he would do it quite rough and fast.. but as the times have gone on hes started being more slow and sort of caressing.. if thats the right way to put it. My feeling have started growing for him, but i dont know if its the same in return.. and i dont want to over think his feelings, because im not going to lie ive seen a fair few sex scenes in films and in porn and the more romantic ones are where their going slower cherishing the moment kind of stuff.. What do you think??
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (17 September 2012):
 nope... men that have not loved me have been tender and wonderful lovers.
and my current partner... loves me more than anyone ever has but is the least tender or gentle lover I've ever had... no romance... no finese... all slam bam thank you mam
sorry you can't use the concept of tender lovemaking as a guide for if a man loves you or not.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (17 September 2012):
 No, OP, don't hang on to the illusion that the way a man makes love is an indicator of anything but his personal sexual stile , tastes and preferences, and/ or current mood.
One can be occasionally, or even often, or even ALWAYS the most affectionate , romantic,sensuous lover in the bedroom , and the most emotionless, indifferent ,callous bastard outside of it. ( For being PC : that may apply to women too, even if perhaps to a minor extent ). This creates a sort of cognitive dissonance that may bewilder even the most sophisticate of us... and it is difficult to believe that such tender kisses and caresses may not mean particularly anything ... still , lovemaking style is not a good mirror of feelings.
Not saying that your bf can't be falling in love with you- he could be very well right now. But you'll see it better from his actions outside of the bedroom- the way he treats you, the way he wants your company, the way he shares his passions and interests with you and wants to share yours, the way he talks to you and about you, the way he treats your friends and family, the way he gives you his time, attention and support when you need it... everything BUT the way he touches you behind closed doors.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2012): "But, is there any way to see how a man feels for you through the way you have sex?"
Nope, not at all OP, and with all due respect to nat1972 I could take her in a room and do all that stuff right now with her, there's no way of telling. I had rough, fast sex with my girlfriend of 7 years earlier because she was heading out for a night out with her friends. We had passionate, slow burning love making last night and the day before we came home drunk and tore each other to pieces.
OP it sounds to me like this guy has just gotten a bit better, less eager and is getting to know your body better from the sex you have it's not possible to tell at all. I've had one night stands of very sensual, romantic sex and then got a taxi straight after because I had to be up early.
It sounds like he's just gotten better OP.
If you want to know how he feels, ask him.
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A
female
reader, nat1972  +, writes (17 September 2012):
 Making love and having sex are 2 different things. You can feel the emotion when you make love to another. You know by the way it feels if it is rushed it is sex. When there is care taken between 2 people, the passion between the 2 is out of this world. Love is a beautiful feeling that raises you out of the depths of who you are. And during it, sometimes you feel like you want to break the person to their knees and cry cause the passion is so deep and entwined. Love is perfect. Sex is combining and leaves you feeling incomplete. Like you just had it for the sake of having it with no intent behind it. There is defanetly a difference. You will know the difference between the 2 by how you both interact with each other. Love is a powerful feeling, and you cannot mistake it.
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A
male
reader, joemassagetherapist +, writes (16 September 2012):
There can be many was to answer this. I'm 48, for me it is more about asking, just talk to him. Making love can be ruff, sensual, all day play and so many other ways.sometimes lust can feel like love ...just talk to him.trust your gut, then your heart ...and always his eyes. good luck be safe have fun.
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