A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I are getting near our 3-year anniversary, and seem to be in a sexual rut. When we first started having sex after the first year, we had sex every other day, and now we go weeks - and now 2 months - barely touching each other. I realize it's always more exciting at first, especially because we were both virgins, but it really does start to get ... well, annoying after 2 months. We want to get married, and we would now but I want to finish college first. So if this doesn't blow over now, I'm afraid it never will.Is there any way to get our sex life back on track?
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (15 June 2009):
 So who is really having the problem initiating things here? That is my question... is your boyfriend just not interested? Are neither of you gutsy enough to initiate things and start up a steamy sesh? Somebody is not holding up their end of the stick here.
There are plenty of ways to get your sex life back on track, it's just a matter of making the effort on both of your parts. You can do things like just go for it. Grab him, start kissing him, push him on the bed and there you go. Or, you could buy a new sexy lingerie number, cook him dinner in it, turn on the Al Green and get busy. Do a strip tease to his favorite song. Buy a brand new sex toy and ask to try it out. Buy a Cosmopolitan and ask him to circle all the dirty things he'd like to try. You can keep things steamy, you just have to stay creative!!
Now your fella, he needs to do things too. He needs to keep up his end of the bargain, by making you feel sexy and loved. I would definitely start by seducing him first (lead by demonstration), enjoy a hot and wild night together and then bring it up - "hey, I really miss doing that... remember when we used to have sex all the time? That was so much fun, I miss that!". Figure out what's going on with him, if he's uncomfortable, has lost interest, has any physical problems he's not telling you...
You guys need to have an open and honest talk. But, that can probably happen a lot easier after you've given him some delicious sex and reminded him what he's missing. But, I think especially virgins have trouble communicating together - your fella doesn't have a lot of practice with this stuff. But be gutsy and bring it up! If you want to get married, you'll have to figure out how to talk about this stuff openly!
Good luck, sweetness!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2009): yes spice things upbe brave and have a discussion about what things you both would like to try (never do anything your not comfortable with)if your not brave enough to talk then buy a sexy outfit and that should help thingsyou could get a copy of karma sutra and agree to try different pages from the book, either randomly picked or each of your choosing which page you wanthave a romantic night out and be wearing some sexy underweargo to a sex shop like ann summers together - less intimidating that your average sex shop
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