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Is there any way that I can get him to realize what he's lost?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (14 October 2007) 2 Answers - (Newest, 14 October 2007)
A female Canada age 30-35, *emonic_cookie writes:

I was recently dumped by a boyfriend of six months. Our relationship was very intense (got together on a school trip in romantic Paris) and had lots of ups and downs. Recently, he told me he'd suddenly realized he didn't love me anymore. He changed his mind several times, and ended up dragging me back and forth until he finally left me. I was confused, and at first tried to get him back. He basically gave me mixed messages for a good two weeks and deliberately tried to hurt me (saying we'd be friends and inviting me somewhere, only to leave me hanging or lie to me, bugging me in front of our friends, buying things he knew I loved for himself and telling me, reading a romantic poem about a "particular girl" in front of half the school and then denying it was about anyone) until a couple of days ago I told him that while I appreciated his attempts at friendship, I couldn't handle the things he was doing and didn't want any contact with him until further notice.

He says he doesn't know if he still loves me (he probably doesn't), but every time I see him, he looks miserable. When he knows I can see him, he overracts and acts like he's WAY happier than when he doesn't think I can see him. All this to say, am I right to cut him off, and is there any way that I can get him to realize what he's lost?

View related questions: mixed messages

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A male reader, Tommy7 United States +, writes (14 October 2007):

You should know that you don't want disrespect. Therefore, you need to dump him and find a more respectful bf.

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A female reader, Sassister United States +, writes (14 October 2007):

He is ambivalent. That means "no" he is not interested. He knows what he has lost. He's a jerk. It's hard to do, but you must move on.

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