A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: The girl I like doesn't know it but I want to tell her. It's become apparent that she is gay but I have not actually asked her so i don't know for sure. She invited me on a date and we had a great time and laughed at each others jokes. I made her a birthday cake and she loved it, then I took her to a concert and we danced. At a party we held hands and she was so happy to see me that she ran and sat down next to me. Our hugs are longer than normal. I want to tell her how I feel but I don't want to ruin a friendship. What do i do? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2009): I've been there - but the other way around. I've been crazy for a friend, our hugs were longer than normal - etc etc - everyone said he was gay too. Hmmm. I never found out - I was too chicken and now we live on opposite sides of the world. Do yourself a favour - be braver than me and just ask her - otherwise it will be the one thing you regret. Or maybe get someone else to ask her what her sexuality is. Maybe you could email her - but make sure that you tell her in your email that you value her friendship first and foremost and if she isn't interested in you in that way you really still want to be mates. Other people have scared me off before my being too presumptuous about what the outcome would be. Hope it goes well!!!
Ps. A friend of mine once bit the bullet and just told her friend how she felt. Now they are engaged with three children :)
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (16 November 2009):
She seems to like you a lot, so I'm not sure where this 'gay' thing has come from. Unless she outwardly says it or makes it terribly obvious, I think you should just say that you'd really like to get to know her more and see what happens.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy +, writes (16 November 2009):
Life is risk. To win big you need to gamble big.
Tell her, and to be honest, it seems she likes you.
If she doesn't love you back, well that happens. But if you don't tell her and she does have feelings, then you might never know.
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