A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:A guy added me on myspace began talking to me. We have been talking for about a month and have similar interests, good conversation, and he is very interested in me. He wants to meet me, but there is one catch. All of my myspace pictures are about two years old, because I had some bad health issues (cancer and thyroid level problems) that have caused me to gain about 40 pounds since the pictures were taken. I've been very depressed about this, and avoid pictures now because no matter how much I work out or how healthy I eat I am unable to lose weight because of my health problems. I don't update my pictures because of this, but this has never been an issue because all of my myspace friends know me in real like so they know what I look like, except for this guy.He is a very fit guy, and I am not sure how he would respond to meeting me in person and me being a size 14 as opposed to the size 7 I was in pictures. Is there a way I can tell him this (it's a heavy subject I don't like talking about) or should I just put on a "skinny" outfit, meet him, and hope for the best?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2009): I think you should be honest with him. Take a picture of yourself today and post it. Preferably a full body shot. Look your best and see how he responds. This will save yourself any embarrassment you might receive by and in-person meeting. But, as always, looks shouldn't be what is important, rather what is in the heart. Remember, love is not a feeling, love is a commitment!
A
female
reader, Shanell +, writes (26 October 2009):
U need 2 tell him that u gained weight cause when he meet u he's gonna be mad cause u not what he expected & all that weight is gonna catch him off guard.
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A
female
reader, hahabooboo2 +, writes (26 October 2009):
Girl i think that you should tell him because if he likes you then he will still like you when he meets you
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A
female
reader, RCK  +, writes (26 October 2009):
No just tell him the photo's are from two years back and to date you are alot me curver then you were back then. I mean you still enjoy the same interest together and so there should be nothing stopping you two getting on. Tell him the truth about your health and the medication that you were on before you meet as it may give him more of an understanding. When your out there to meet protential dates always start on an honesty basis and that includes putiing up a photo of yourself now not in the past. Try not to dwell on what you use to look like and love the body you are in. Once you find your own happiness with how you look nothing can bring you down. Don't allow yourself to miss out on a great time because of how you look. The cancer and thyroid problems should have opened your eyes to see that life is too short to sulk. Go out and have fun!! Breathe the air in and think to yourself how can I make this day more interesting. So tell him about yourself before you meet and if he says "no" remember time is too short to dwell just move on to that special someone that says "yes" If the guy wants to judge you by how you look then his personality is crap and is definately not worth your time.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't feel like I led him on or lied to him. I don't use myspace for dating, just keeping in touch with friends. I actually have a private profile and am friends ONLY with people I know in real life. My main picture is a recent face shot, so it's not like I'm luring strange guys in with a sexy picture. I made a first time exception and added him even though I didnt know him because we had similar interests and I liked the short stories he wrote. He was the one who has initiated all conversations with me. He's the only one who I am friends with on myspace that I don't actually know.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (26 October 2009):
I'm afraid older sister has it right. If you lie now, you'll lie later. A good guy will always like you for who you are.
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