A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:The other day a couple of my close female friends were telling me about how girls have different opinions of people than they show in person.I was curious and asked what they thought about me in the thoughts they keep to themselves. After pressing them a bit, One of them said this:"You have low self esteem because you spent a lot of your youth improving yourself to impress girls and since it didnt pan out that well, you keep it low to punish yourself. Stop trying to be a frat guy. Whatever they do is not anywhere close to what you have. If you own who you have been all these years, that will get all the girls, not faking being one of them(people we know). What you have is better. You have nothing to cause you low self esteem. This good guy with a heart of gold is better than anything to get the quality women."It really shook me. Meanwhile, this has lifted my a bit self esteem into trying to accept who I am. I tend to not believe that.I was always miserable about how little experience I have with women. I had a girlfriend in high school but I'm still a virgin. I see so many people in our grad school have casual hookups/ONS with each other and I havent. They said I'm just not wired that way and I internally know I want girlfiends (one at a time). I have a very high libido and crave sex/intimacy but since I havent had much I tend to think the problem is with me but they dont see it that way and think I'm in my owm head.Are they "lying" to make me feel better or can you see some truth in what they say?
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libido, self esteem, still a virgin Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2016): CindyCares! I dont know why it felt so different hearing it from my friends. I guess what I was told here was stuff I wanted to believe but shunned because I didnt see it in real life. This confirmed all the Aunts and Uncles advice in person for me.
I'm going to practice letting go of any thoughts against myself and try to smile about who I've brought myself to become. See if that changes my luck.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (10 May 2016):
 OP ! I am pretty sure that many Aunts and Uncles had told you already, more or less, what your friends just told you. Several times, and also recently. The wording might have been different but the gist was the same. And you always sort of went like : " yeah, whatever " on us.
Then a couple of young pipsqueaks from school chime up " You know, etc.etc. ... " and - you see the light : maybe they are right !
Sigh... being an Aunt is a hard , unrewarding task some times :) LOL
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