A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I'm in love with a man who is forty years old and I am 60. I really don't look much older than late forties. We became very close last year, but then had a break up. We have now starting seeing each other occasionally again but there seems to be a barrier that wasn't there before. He was very hurt by his wife who left him 2 years ago. He seems distant and I think he is indifferent to me, but then tells me that I can go to his place any time I want, without even phoning. I seem him sometimes through my work and he seems to be playing a game. But when we have an evening together and after a few drinks, he seems to want to be close to me. I am very confused as he seems unable to tell me directly that he would like to see me or even 'phone me, but then drops hints about going places together. I don't know if I should give it up or go for it!
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (13 August 2008):
 You don't know where you stand with him. It seems he suggests "going places" because he'd like to sleep with you, but then says he's been hurt in order to avoid greater intimacy.
I think you should know exactly where you stand with him. In my opinion, you should ask him up front.
A
female
reader, pinktopaz  +, writes (13 August 2008):
Gosh, 40 year-old men still act like this?! Well, I would say that in his eyes, he's not playing games. But he may be having a commitment issue. This leads to him stringing you along because he cannot decide what he wants. Just live your own life, but don't make him your exclusive "one-and-only" until he decides to make you his.
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