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female
,
anonymous
writes: There's a guy that I'm crazy about, and however much I tell myself he's just another guy and I don't need him when I'm not with him, just to look at him or him to say one word to me and I seem to just surrender to him. I'd do anything for him even if I don't want to and I hate it because I have no control. Is this a negative unhealthy thing, or am I just madly in love and not enjoying the fact that my world centres around someone else? Should I steer clear of this guy? If it is because I love him then what am I supposed to do, if this happens to every guy I fall head over heels for? I'm going to hate it and end up backing away out of all my relationships, and die alone! I've been with this guy before a few times and although he makes me happy and I love being with him I can't stand it that if he clicks his fingers I'll come running. Everybody tells me I should move on, that I can do better than him and I know it's true but I'm just not strong enough to overcome the feelings he brings out in me. I've tried so many times to get over him, but we've been out 3 times, been sex buddies, cheated on his girlfriends and ended up fooling around on numerous occasions outside of a relationship. I can't stand it that he has all the control!
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female
reader, pica +, writes (17 November 2006):
He has control because you give it to him. The fact that you are questoning this is a good sign though. I suspect there's a self-esteem issue involved .. somehow, how you feel about yourself is tied into how he feels about you. You're looking for his approval. You know, if it was going to work then you wouldn't be where you are now. If friends are telling you to move on, you should listen to them and get their support to help you do just this. Good luck. Don't worry about patterns of future relationships just now. And you know, he is just another guy ...
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2006): hey!! i dont think ur feelings for him are a bad thing,i bet he's well flattered.but u should definitely try to resist and play it kinda cool for a while..ull see him come running for a change!!
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