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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi guys, i'm a happily attached lady hoping for some advice on a small problem that i am facing at work. Basically i'm wondering whether you lot think that the following is just innocent friendliness or something more sleazy...The managing director at my workplace is a married man with 3 children and he knows that i have a partner. Working at the front of house he regularly passes my desk on his way into the office and makes friendly small talk with me. However over the past few weeks i have noticed that he is becoming more and more friendly and making more of an effort to chat to me, and at the recent office party when i had to leave early i noticed him giving me a lingering look when i left the room. A few days ago he brought another senior member of staff into the offices and made a comment to him about me being very attractive which i found embarassing. The other day he said that he would like to take me out for a posh lunch and got a bit flustered when he asked me, he then muttered a funny comment that i could hardly hear about the fact that he hopes i didnt think he was being sleazy and something to the effect of keeping it 'clean'. I didn't know what to say or what he meant by this and being put on the spot like that said that that may be nice sometime. Now i don't know what to think of this whether he is just being friendly as i know that its not uncommon for bosses to take their workers for meals and stuff or whether i'm being naive and that this is not appropriate. Please help.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Hag +, writes (27 December 2006):
It sounds to me that this either is something new to him or he's testing his boundaries with you. You should definitely turn him down at your next opportunity with a very honest "i'm not comfortable with that' and, if he persists with 'it's clean. no intentions' then give him a simple 'no'. If you don't want to be accusatory and still aren't sure of his intentions then only go with a group. I suggest that you never ever go to lunch or anywhere alone with this man. If still not certain, then think about how you would want your partner to respond in a similar situation.
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