A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:I’m new to the area and looking for friends and to spend my time productively. I met a coworker who is also female and we agreed to meet to exercise. However while no set plans and a good reason it seems she always has an excuse. Last time she said she had to complete work at home. This week she had to go out of town for her dads birthday. She is very career driven so is very involved in work but is she that busy or just doesn’t want to go and is blowing me off?
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 April 2023): Have you considered joining a workout class? You'll meet people, and it takes opening-up to people and putting yourself out-there.
Cornering people at work is easy; but most co-workers aren't that interested in friendships off-site. They may participate in a few afterwork gatherings, or work-sponsored events; but trying to corner your co-workers into commitments aside from work might be as bad as dating co-workers.
If it becomes a strain to get them to stick to promises; that's letting you know they were just trying to be nice, because you "guilted" or "pressured" them into agreeing to hanging-out after-work.
A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  +, writes (6 April 2023):
 If someone really wants to make time for you, they will find a way. If not, they will find excuses.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (5 April 2023):
 Maybe a bit of both?
I'd go work out on my own, and look for friendships outside of work.
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