A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Not sure what to think anymore but basically heres the story . I met this girl we knew each other before! We started talking on a night out and supprisingly we hit it off ! We met up a few times and we really liked each other so we started dating.Four months in we were fine still going pretty well (the usual i met her family she met mine etc)(her family would tell her dont loose him and mine would say its good to see you happy again etc)Well the 1st week off october (last year) i had a set back (family member pass away) So the friday of that week i aranged to meet her and a few mates as i aint seen any of them due to obvious reasons. I had a txt of her sayin " are you in town yet " to which i replyed " yeah just at the bar just waiting on my mates " she replyed " come over in in the other bar if your all alonexxx" i Asked who she was with she said " usual crowd so and so " knowing her friends are boys i had no worries because she said she has no interst in them. So i came to meet her, got her a drink, kissed hugged etc then this guy came over and tapped her on the shoulder and said "im popping to the other bar" and walked out, thought nothing of it as she has a few frinds that are guys, she stayed with me then she said " fancy going to the other bar?" i said ok she went over with her other mate, i turned up there, she was with her mate so i kissed her and said "love you " she replied the same. i went to speak to my mates who just turned up, she tapped me on the shoulder and said "im just going to sit up here see you in sec" i went up to find she was sitting with that guy from the other bar with her mates so i kept an eye on it because i did notice they were getting a bit flirty.I had a text off her then sayin " tbh im not sure me and you will last if you dont trust me " so i questiond her, she started screaming at me, stormed off, said she would see me later. Saw her later, i tried to talk to her all she could say was " you dont trust me " needless to say we argued and didnt talk all weekend. i tried to text her but all i got was "i need time to think" the monday came and we had arrangements so we stuck it out, she just kept picking at me and picking at me until i snapped and said " its over " and walked away angry.I got a text message off her then saying "get a grip " "whats wrong with you " i got told that that night she came home crying and so was i tbh ! a week went by when a friend told me "i ran into your ex last nite " she said "she still cares about you, loves you and wants to talk to you" Feeling the same way i caught on facebook needless to say another argument errupted and she told me she started seeing someone else which to me says Rebound so i let her be. Then abusive text messages started.. lies were said about me she would turn up with this guy randomly at places and she would just stare. The guy shes with now was the guy at the bar! who just came out of a 3 year relationship and has a child. she moved in with him after 4 months and got engaged and she has changed prsonalities big time as she has lost all her friends and family over this year..After christmas i heard nothing until june where unexpectedly she cornered me in a night club and said she was sorry for everything that happened and the way its turned out. we must have talked for at least 40 mins i told her " why would you want to be friends now after all this... you got everything you want the flat.. the step child... even the guy you want... she replied " i live with him yes.. im not happy with him at all because i love you " still got the stares off her all that night and got accused of cheating on her with a friend! So is she telling the truth judging by the signs or do I go by logic and walk away?
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys ! The reason why I posted on her for advice is because I askedtold my friends who are boys and girls this situation and they all all answere " oo I don't know " . But her maybe still likeing me explains why a few other things and starting arguments like 1.for obvious reasons I deleted her on facebook ( cause you just don't wanna see your ex declareing her love for a new guy 1 week after a break up to which that caused an argument) 2. After the break up a month later I decide I was gonna go to australia for a year she found out and begged me not to go (I didn't go due to money problems) 3.The stares (which her and my friends point out) in pub/clubs and bites her lip with the constant storming off if I'm with another girl 4. She changed her look and then she goes around accuseing me of cheating on her with differnt girls when I was with her( I say she was trying to get my attention)! The other reason why I posted is cause this guy she's with now was trying his luck on with my current gf (before we got together and before he met my ex) yes my current gf told me bout this and she told him "no" then another friend of mine came forward and said "he did the same with me" then presisted to say he met my ex and how he really likes her and dosnt know how to approach her and my friend told him to back off she with so and so (me) but he just kept pushing of couse the events leading up to that Friday and onwards you know !
A
female
reader, emmss +, writes (6 October 2010):
 Walk away. Just literally, stop talking to her. If you see her out at the bar, don't talk to her. She's just not worth it. She gets bored with the things she has already, and wants something new to keep her interested. You could do a lot better than her, you sound like a really nice caring guy. But she just obviously doesn't see it. She wants what she can't have, and then doesn't want it. She probably just wants you back, because she's got bored of her new life.
Also, picking fights with you for no reason doesn't sound very nice, that could be a way of her saying I don't want you, but I want you to want me.
But yeah, definitely walk away. If she confronts you about it, you can always say to her that you don't want to be used like you were.
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A
male
reader, mrvhappy +, writes (6 October 2010):
Hi,
TBH with you, it sounds like she's still into you and wants you, but she now has a partner & family.
Best thing to do is to leave the ball in her court if you want her back.
Just tell her to call you for a chat when shes NOT in a relationship....but dont hold yr breath.
Move on and start dating others...who knows you might find the one
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A
female
reader, celtic_tiger +, writes (6 October 2010):
 Run away as fast as you can in the opposite direction.
I get the impression this one likes the things she cant have, then once she has them, she doesnt want them any more.
DO you want to be with someone who can turn on you so quickly? Really?
It didnt work once, what is the likelyhood of things working this time? Will she just get bored and move on?
I think you sound like a good guy, find someone who loves you and deserves you. This one certainly doesnt.
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