A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My good friend of 2 years and his girlfriend, who I've been friends with for 6 months, just broke up. And now she's going out with me and he's upset about it.She broke up with him because she has a lot of issues of her own and so did he, so she couldn't cope with the stress of having his issues on top of hers. She started talking to me a lot more than she used to, and one day we sent 50+ texts to each another. And then she told me she fancied me, and we started going out.We seem to get on pretty well, although she's been a little argumentative. The problem is I'm curious as to whether she's on the rebound or not.She had went out with my best friend for 4 months, and she had fancied him for some time before that. They had a pretty intense relationship, and now I'm wondering if she's turned to me because I am the opposite of him - I'm pretty care-free. Also, she said in the past her ideal guy was a "tortured artist"-type, and he fits that type, but I'm nothing like that or who she'd usually like. Also, how could she know me for the four months she dated him, and the two months beforehand, and only just notice she liked me recently? When she was asked about me in that sense by him before she dated him, she said there's no way she'd consider dating me as she just didn't find my attractive. And now she finds me "hot". I've not changed either, so it makes little sense.She's also being very cold and bitchy to my best friend, who is quite pissed off and depressed about it all.Does this seem like a rebound, and if so is she likely to stick around for much longer? Do you think she's over him as well? She is avoiding him a lot and being bitchy to him. She told him that her acting like a bitch now should help him get over her.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2007): Hey, it's the guy that wrote this..
As I think I said, we went out every day following her break-up, and spent hours and hours together. Since we've started dating, we've only went out once. This could be as the cafe we used to go to all the time shut down. But still, we hardly go out now. We text a lot, and talk on e-mail but that's really it.
A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (17 July 2007):
Maybe there's nothing to this, and maybe yes, she's on the rebound. You'll know with time. My advice: take it slowly. As flower girl said, she's with you now. She seems very interested. Don't spoil a relationship with early suspicions. That can do a lot of damage.
A comment: if you think she noticed you only after she broke up with her boyfriend, you're dead wrong. She noticed you a long time ago.
As to the rest, I agree with flower girl.
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A
female
reader, flower girl +, writes (17 July 2007):
Everyone has an image of the person who we think we want to be with and sometimes reality is just not the same.
Maybe she thought you were not her type and he was and when they started seeing each other it just was not what she expected.
She is going to have seen a different side to you whilst she was dating your friend and maybe realised that yoou were the type of person she was actually attracted too.
Some people do chose the route of trying to be really nasty to there exe's with the hope they will get over them quicker, so i don't think you should worry about that.
She is with you now and you say you get on pretty well so just go with the flow.
Take care.xx.
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