A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:A few months back I met this girl, at the fitness club, in the pool. We had seen each other a couple of times there as we are pretty regular swimmers but never talked to each other. Finally one day we did and started talking to each other. After a few days she even introduced me to this guy friend of 6 years (which I am not sure, could be her bf, I never confirmed it) who comes to swim only cause of her and only ones a month or so.Recently she has started texting me very regularly and tells me if something exciting has happened to her. We both greet good mornings and good nights each other every day. She tells me about her dreams the previous night. In some of them she said she saw me having a fun time with her. She laughs at my jokes when I am with her. But more importantly during one of my conversation with her, she told me how much she likes to be complimented and how it makes her happy. And I jokingly told her that I will give her a compliment every morning. She took it seriously and now she expects a compliment every morning. I took it like a joke at first but now I feel like I like her. This complimenting thing is making me fall for her. I have complimented her on her looks, smile, eyes, intelligence, and etc. sometimes she even tells me that only I have noticed these things about her. If I tell her I should stop this she says no to it. And tells me how much she enjoys it.I am too scared to ask her this thinking it will ruin the friendship which I really like with her and I don’t want to ruin it. But I want to know (especially from the girl readers, a third person, unbiased view) is that does she like me or is she just being friendly. She is a sweet girl and I am thinking that maybe she doesn’t know that she is being too friendly with a guy friend and sees me only as a friend.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOk so I liked a girl whom I met at a pool at a fitness club. She is totally a free minded girl and I like her for that. She once said that she liked to be complimented and I jokingly said that I would compliment her every day. She took it seriously and I started sending her mushy compliments every morning. Over the time I started falling for her. She has a guy friend she has known for 6 years. I asked her about him and she said they are just close friends. I believed it and told her that I like her. She said she needed time to give me an answer as she doesn’t know me so well. I agreed. Later I found out that the guy likes her too and had already told her this. But she never gave him an answer as well. But she did tell me that he has a huge age gap and don’t think she can like him. I believed her again.
Again a few weeks later I saw them sitting at the coffee shop. I just couldn’t stop myself from spying on them. I saw nothing out of the ordinary happen between them while they were sitting there but after they left he walked her home holding hands all the while.
I was heartbroken after seeing this and called her up later that night. I told her what I saw. She told me that she is like that with all her friends, be it male or female. She likes holding hands when they walk. She never held my hand and told me that she thought I was too shy. Thoughts started running through my mind and I had to ask her. If she had ever slept with him. She got very hurt by that question and replied no. she cried and I can’t stand it when she cries and feel guilty about it.
Am I wrong here? Is it normal for a guy and girl just friends to be holding hands like that? Did I read too much into it? Should I stop having feelings for her and stop sending her mushy text?
A
female
reader, iloveyoubicth +, writes (24 December 2009):
I thinl she likes you so you should go and ask her on a date and see how things go and if she says no than just except it and continue being friends.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (23 December 2009):
It sounds like she does like you. But there really is only one way to find out, and that's to ask her out for a drink or something. Even if it's just a friendly drink, you can get to know her more.
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