A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok so my girlfriend for a good one year broke up with me... telling me that i been stressing her out too much and that she's not feeling the same thing anymore and that she finally lost love to me. i mean we were really good friends before we started dating. during our relationship we will always finish each other sentences and always know what each other is thinking. but recently i did the unthinkable... we were sleeping together and i have no idea what i did but i touched her down there while she was sleeping (the biggest mistake i've ever made) i didn't know what i was thinking and i was half asleep during that time and tod me that she was disappointed of me. the next day talking to her and i told her i love you and she never said it back and didnt allow me to kiss her so i knew something was wrong. and thats when she told me she doesn't feel the same anymore. but she never told me the main reason why as she blabbers other reasons why she dumped me such as im too emotional. So yea we talked and had a mutual break up. no hard feelings whatsoever in my part. so after a few days we talked but it wasn't the same i could tell how she talked that we became distant. So she told me the usual "we can only be friends and nothing more" and that devastated me because i really love and care for this girl (she broke up with me once but went back to her because i love her so much). So i told her i can never be friends with you as its only going to torture me so i pleaded her to block me on facebook to get over her (she did but only unfriended me which was weird). So i have another social network that i use and she's also a user of that site. I saw that she posted a picture of us together...which was really weird because she's the one who dumped me and that she has viewed my profile twice. i have not contacted whatsoeverso guys do you think NC is working and that she misses me?
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male
reader, mrg123  +, writes (14 July 2011):
 I'd have to ask first off how much you know about your ex-partners past because how you describe things makes me think she has definitely had something happen in her past which prompted her reaction. It seems to me the break-up was less about you and her and more about the raw nerve you unintentionally scraped. Her reaction is a classic defence mechanism in that she pushed you away because what you did made her feel you would hurt her. Logically, this can only be because of a past experience which has led her to the impression you would.
Now, to your actual question. You don't say how recently this was so in that regard its hard to take her putting the picture up as concrete evidence either way; but, I think yes she most likely is missing you because I am not altogether sure her feelings have vanished overnight and since there was no real reason for your break-up I find it hard to imagine she was being entirely truthful when she said she had stopped totally loving you.
What you can do about this is a bit of a trickier question. If the reason for her reaction is the obvious one that suggests itself well then she may well need counselling to help her get over that experience. I do have to say the point of NC is to move on so in that regard it isnt working because I dont think either of you have. I am going to go out on a limb and say if the picture has been posted recently, and she knows you will probably see it; it's a coded message to say shes still thinking of you at the very least and maybe even an invitation to make contact. In your position, i'd be highly tempted to take a gamble and get in touch. If you do or not is up to you. Good luck :)
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