A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hi I wonder if you can advise me. I posted on here before and got some good balanced sensible advice which really helped so I'm back for more!I met a guy in February on an internet dating site. We are going to meet in two weeks time. We got on well and had a lot of contact but he can be a bit flaky with contact.We had contact this week and all is ok but now and then he seems to feel able to be 'flaky'. He is nice, not malicious or anything like that ..... We spoke for hours on Monday and spoke a few times a week over the last week and last night he said he might be online and was .... i mailed him at some point in the evening to say Hi how are you? and he did not reply ... he read the mail but did not reply. He has done this before here and there .. and seems to think nothing of it. A mutual friend of ours emailed him the same evening and he replied to her that he was looking forward to his date in two weeks .... (ie with me) but yet he did not reply to my email. He is usually ok but now and then gets a bit flaky with communication.I get really annoyed about these things as i find it discourteous. I don't expect him to talk to me all the time but if i send a mail surely a quick reply back is polite, even if to say 'hi i'm fine hope you ok but busy just now' or whateverThe thing is we have not met yet so i guess nobody owes anybody anything but we do have quite a connection so far ... am i overreacting or should i just see it as nothing ... and if I DO decide to mention it, how can I phrase it without causing an argument? Sorry if this sounds silly but I just came out of a damaging relationship a few months ago and am a bit sensitive and maybe I do overreact but i gets me so cross and I almost was on the verge of cancelling our meeting but a friend said that might be a bit OTT. Any comments would be gratefully appreciated ...Thanks :) Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, longandsmooth87  +, writes (16 July 2008):
well this is kinda like a story an old woman told me about a woman that was very interested in a man and he didnt pay her as much attention as she did him. but anyways the moral of the story was cats (women) dont chase dogs (men), so make him pursue you. let him kno that your the woman that you should be pursued not him, so basically ignore him for a few days just so he knows that your not totally interested. it works, and if at the very worst he stops talking to you, then you kno he wasnt the kinda guy you wanted to be with anyway
A
female
reader, Minelisse  +, writes (16 July 2008):
 Well I actually think you should just ask him, in a non-nagging way... if possible! Maybe just out of curiosity (as if you didn't care), or just bring the subject up without directly going into him not answering and see what he has to say.
The truth is when you start to know someone (by whatever means) this is the time to see their traits and attributes. What he is now should probably give you an idea of how he usually is. Meet him and talk to him, you'll have a 6th sense of it further on!
Good luck!
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