A
male
age
36-40,
*ecurelove23
writes:[Mod note: OP original title]Hi,I am quite troubled with my relationship. I love her a lot and just her.. I have never tried to cheat on her and would just never do it. I am so sure of my love for her.. But thing is like that there are doubts in our relationship. I feel that my girlfriend is using me. I pay her for all the stuff, i give her a monthly allowance. I pay for her hair cut.etc..etc... Simply i am sort of being a dad for her rather than being a boy friend.. I am just 21 and by gods grace come from a pretty good family. hence i have no issues in finances.. But i am getting this feeling for quite a long time that i am being used by her.. though she says that she is totally serious and commited.... But i doiubt her.. I even keep on taking out her call details, and things like that.. And most of the time i get disaapointed because something fishy always comes there.. And she just responds that they are just her friends.... I am confused... Help me... Reply to this Question
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male
reader, dyeruz  +, writes (29 June 2010):
Stop giving her an allowance what is she your employee, your daughter? She's a grown woman, if she wants her hair cut and clothes she needs to work for it. Not that you're being taken for a ride but obviously money isnt an issue for you but this relationship is not on equal footing, you're paying for all this stuff and like it or not you're expecting something in return except if you're not into someone you're just not into someone, you can fake it but not for long. Don't give her an allowance and see what she does or how she acts, at the end of the day you may love her but she may not love you, and throwing no amount of money at it will change that, best to accept the heartache and move on, you're still young with your life ahead of you. Good luck.
A
male
reader, witsend  +, writes (26 June 2010):
i am in sort of the same situation as you are friend. I paid for everything for my girlfriend too. rarely ever got a thank you either. kept expecting more from me until i had nothing left. other men trouble also-secret text messages, calls, all from other men. "friends" i was also told. you are not alone. if she will go along, sit her down and have an honest discussion about the state of your relationship. maybe yours will work out, unlike mine. i thought i would get honesty, all i got was more lies and wild stories. i was a fool. don't be like me. love can make you do some stupid things.
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