A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have a question about my girfriend. I think for a woman she drinks quite a bit. I am not a big drinker, may be that's why for me it seems like a lot. She ussualy goes between 7-10 drinks a week. She doesn't drink every day, but when she is out with girls it's 3-4. When we go out,it's ussualy 2. She is ussualy out with different set of girls once a week, and we go out twice a a week, sometimes 3. She never drinks at home, or during the day, so i dont think she has problems. But in a long run, can it turn into something like alcoholism ?She sometimes gets pretty buzzed especially when she is out with girls, that's why she doesn't like to drive. I am looking for answers from people who are social drinkers. Because for me , almost non drinker it seems like sheis overdoing it, but may be its normal amount? Thank you. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2014): For people who don't drink at all it might seem like your girlfriend drinks a lot. It's the same with smoking. I smoked for 20 years before I completely stoped 2-4 cigarettes a day. Also I smoked super lights and super slim cigarettes. Sometimes I didn't smoke for days. So,in fact I was a very very light smoker. But everyone around me who didn't smoke cringed everytime they saw me with cigaret. But those who smoked a pack a day use to tell me that I am just playing , not realy smoking. For someone who doesn't drink, or have one beer a week, it seems like a lot 7-10 drinks a week. But in fact many woman drink on a regular basis 2 glasses of wine a day, every single day for their whole life, never becoming alcoholics. Your girlfriend doesn't have a problem, at least now. I don't drink as much as her. I rarely drink during a week, but when I am out, ussualy once a a week, I can have 3 glasses of wine during the night easy.
A
male
reader, RevMick  +, writes (23 May 2014):
 Hi,
From a purely medical stand point you as a woman aren't meant to consume more than 3 drinks in any one 24 hour period. Or weekly around 7 units.
From a social stand point, there is nothing worse than those binge drinkers who drink til they puke and it's usually out in the street.
If she isn't getting to that point, and it only sounds like she social drinks then I would think there is no issue. 2 glasses of wine are hardly pushing the boat out.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2014): That's nothing. My wife can go through 7-10 drinks in one night.
I have friends who have a beer or two after work every day and then tonnes over the weekend. I have some who have a glass of wine with every meal. That's technically a functioning alcoholic but apart from the health risks it has no negative impact on their lives and sure everything is a health risk.
She's not overdoing it. If she was drinking to get wasted every time you're out then that's overdoing it, if she was lying about it, had to drink, embarrassing you, hurting herself physically etc. There's nothing wrong with a couple of sociable drinks when having a meal or out in a bar. Where I'm from it's weird not to, literally someone not drinking is odd when out and is only really done if they're driving, pregnant or on antibiotics.
OP some people handle social occasions a bit better with some drinks in them, she's drinking as an enhancement, it makes things a little more fun and probably makes conversation easier for her too. I see no problem in it at all.
Maybe it's where you're from but literally everyone where I'm from has a social drink, it makes things more fun and enjoyable. People are more comfortable, less inhibited, jokes are funnier, with the right wine food tastes better so our attitude is why not? It can make even the most boring of people easier to tolerate and frankly, OP, hanging out with a partner's teetotaller parents is even more of a reason to have some liquid loosener.
The fact that she limits the amount of drinks she has when around says she's very responsible about it. She knows her limits according to the company in which she is present. A problem drinker just gets blasted no matter who they're with. Lack of self-control is the only real problem when it comes to alcohol, it sounds like she has plenty of self-control.
Think of it like putting a bet on a football game once or twice a week. Gambling can be a huge problem as an addiction but once or twice a week and not much money being lost is not a problem at all. It's the same thing really.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (23 May 2014):
 ok like many young women it sounds like she might overdo it a tiny bit when out with the girls...
other than that I see no red flags at all.
here is a good page to give you a more fleshed out idea and make your own determination.
http://www.helpguide.org/mental/alcohol_abuse_alcoholism_signs_effects_treatment.htm
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2014): This is OP.
Thank you for responses. It's just my parents were in town, and my dad mentioned that she drinks on every occasion we are out. Again, not much, 2 glasses of wine, but still. I think she likes to get buzzed, it's not that she can't live without it, but she would prefer when sheis out to get a drink rather than not.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2014): Sounds pretty normal if not reserved! Only three drinks on a night out with the girls is pretty controlled!
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (23 May 2014):
 From a medical standpoint, women should not exceed 7 drinks in a week and never exceed 3 drinks in a single day - women start developping health related problems linked to alcohool consumption from a lower intake level than men ( liver disease, heart disease, higher risk of breast cancer, etc.). They are also likely to began developping an alcohol addiction from a smaller intake than men.
Your gf is more or less within safe limits , maybe she can lay off that 3rd or 4th drink at times . She does not NEED to feel " buzzed " to have fun and enjoy her night out, hopefully ?
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (23 May 2014):
 I think she sounds pretty normal to me. She's not drinking at home, she's not getting hammered or blackout drunk. Two drinks when going out to dinner sounds appropriate. 3-4 drinks with the girls on the weekend, sounds okay to me too.
I assume she's about the same age as you, and it seems like she knows her boundaries and isn't drinking like a 21 year old anymore. She sounds fine to me! I wouldn't worry.
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A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (23 May 2014):
Sounds normal to me (both over-drinker and social drinker). Don't see how it will become a problem if it isnt a problem now. And getting buzzed is normal, it's usually the goal/idea behind drinking.
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