A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am good friends with this girl I met back in sixth form. We live close to each other and used to meet up all the time, especially since she passed her driving test. We enjoy each other's company a lot and when we couldn't meet, we chatted online at night. Lately, however, we haven't managed to meet up but have been chatting online instead. However, despite our usual good chats, it has gone downhill and boring. In my opinion, if you are real friends, there is always something to say even if it's random, but when I discussed this with her the other night she disagreed and said that it is harder to talk in that manner online and that nothing is up. She is a very upfront person but I find this nonsense and believe that there is actually something wrong... like her going off me or something.. :( What's really going on? Please help! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, salvadda  +, writes (28 April 2009):
 I don't know how long her manner has changed, so I find it a bit hard to answer you directly. If this has been going on only for a week or shorter, I would say don't worry. We all have bad days, or something that is on our mind. It could be she has private worries financial difficulties. It could also be family related. It could also be something she is embarrased, shy, etc. about. You did say you were close friends, but sometimes a female needs another female to talk with.
If you have been friends for a long time as you stated she is upfront I would give her the benefit of doubt for now.
I would however stress to her that it does bother you. If you can both make an effort try to get together and have a heart to heart talk in person. Try to explain to her the stress that I can feel when I read your letter that it has put on you. You can express to her how much her friendship means to you, as I can also feel by reading your letter.
If you can or are able try to write her a letter as you said you chat on line. Sometimes it is easier for some ppl to express themselve through writing. Try not to make it confortational as I am sure you won't. You sound like a very caring person, thus you would not cared enough to seek help if you were not. I'm am sure it might be much to do about nothing, but it won't hurt to follow it through.
I do hope it will work for out for both of you. I do know good friends are hard to find.
take care & good luck
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