A
female
age
30-35,
*rossfite
writes:My long distance boyfriend got really distant for weeks until lately, we have talked about it and everything is back to normal. However, few things changed. He doesn't post anything about us on instagram like he used to, he just posts random things and he even posted a pic of a half naked model on his page. I didn't like it, I find it a little disrespectful but I didn't say anything, it's his page he can do whatever pleases him. Yesterday he changed his profile pic to a pic with this girl he is friends with, who has a huge crush on him... but this is not the first time he does it, he already did it before and when I confronted him about it, he said that it was an inside joke between them. But now he did it again. Also today is my birthday.. he called me last night to wish me a happy birthday, afterwards he posted 3 random pictures on instagram, a pic of his car and 2 selfies and he changed his profile pic. He didn't even send me a sweet birthday message and didn't post anything about me like most boyfriends do. He didn't post a pic of me since the first week of November 2014, he had that he was taken in his bio but he removed that also long ago... I'm having doubts about him... could he be pretending to be single?He already did in the past, we broke up and got back together after 6 months..Btw we have been together for 2 years.
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broke up, crush, got back together, long distance Reply to this Question
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female
reader, MSA +, writes (19 January 2015):
 I think you're putting too much emphasis on Instagram/social media. Please don't base what he posts online as signs of how he feels about you or your relationship. Instead of being upset about it, why not use a bit of girl magic? Say: "Honey, let's post a pic of each other on instagram." Or "Honey, how about if you use my pic as your profile picture and you use mine?" Or simply post sweet/cute pics of the both of you and tag him so it shows up on his profile too?
Sometimes men don't like to be watched that closely or confronted about little things such as a random post on Instagram. It just makes you appear insecure and controlling. Instead, try the sweeter/smoother way.
Also you should know and feel whether he loves you or not by the way he treats you, not something he posts on social media.
Relax and try communicating with him.
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (19 January 2015):
 What he was doing online is not enough to say he's pretending to be single. I am not familiar with instagram. Unless there is a status change from "in a relationship" to "single". He called you happy birthday at least. I think you have quite a distance there if you can't celebrate birthdays together. I would think that for a 2 year old boyfriend it's appropriate for him to be sending you a gift in the mail. You didn't mention any gifts so I assume there's none, which is pathetic. If he's been attentive to you and treating you good, then you wouldn't be worrying about his online behavior. When you broke up the first time that didn't have an effect on him. You took him back so he reverted to being distant again. Long distance only works if you have marriage in mind before you live separately. There isn't enough glue to hold you together. I think his reason for being distant is because he is with the girl who crushed on him. When you broke up with him the first time he already lined up somebody else.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2015): I think it's more he's wussing out on dumping you, either way, leave him, you deserve someone fully into you. It's not that you shouldn't do long distance, currently in one myself, it's that he's either done with you, or misrepresenting himself in a way that disrespects you.
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