A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:why is it that when my boyfriend of 3 years hangs up on me when he does not like hearing what I have to say he doesnt talk to me for a couple of days. Is this childish or isnt it. Hes had a bad very bad marriage. thank you. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (22 January 2010):
I think you'll find this is the reason he had a bad marriage. His poor wife probably had to fight against this brick wall. If he can't and won't listen, then he's not worth your time.
A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (22 January 2010):
 Have you considered he had a bad marriage because he is incapable of communicating, and his response to hearing something he doesnt want to hear is to hang up and sulk for several days.
Maybe his wife tried to communicate with him as well, and got the same, or worse, treatment.
Three years and you are still allowing his "bad" marriage to interfere with your relationship with him?
He is being childish, you need to decide if you are willing to put up with this for the rest of your life, or if you need to move on and hopefully meet an adult who you can at least communicate with on an adult level.
...............................
A
female
reader, chinachik +, writes (22 January 2010):
This used to happen to my aunty- where her husband used to cut her off- sometimes mid sentance. She did the same to him. When he was in mid flow with something to say and she was done, she just hung up.
He dosen't do this anymore- hope this helps- good luck.
...............................
A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (22 January 2010):
 No it's not childish. People deal with things in different ways, some people like to walk away instead of getting into arguments, some people like to talk things out, some people like to break things, some people like to cry.
A lot of men deal with confrontation this way, they walk away, hoping you'll forget what you were saying, or calm down, or drop the whole thing.
Read "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" by Dr.John Grey. It is the classic text on explaining difficulties in communication between the sexes. It will give you insight into his behaviour, and give you tips on how to talk to him without him feeling the need to run away.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2010): Oh sweetie, of course he is childish. But what can you do about that? Don't let it hassle you... Only remember when one person is being childish the other one has to be an adult :) So you are stuck being sane.
A lot of men do this though...They withdraw and work things out in their head before they come out to 'talk'. They also feel that if something is broken it needs to be fixed, why talk about it...
But if he is a nice guy, you will see some attempt at changing or taking care of what you were saying. It may not be ideal according to your point of view but it will be there. Don't make his not talking an issue. Just go about your life when he does that.
...............................
|
