A
female
age
36-40,
*atiehenderson
writes:Can LOVE really exist between 2 people? Can two people really find what they are looking for each other? Or is LOVE an idea that is over exaggerated in movies, songs and novels? Do people really find someone they can be happy with forever? Or is it just NOTHING? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2012): Yes, the concept of love is exaggerated - especially in the Western world. Biologically speaking, humans aren't required to 'mate for life'....thus, the concept of finding your 'soulmate' and sticking with that person for the rest of your life, through the good and the bad, is just made up; originally by religious figures and then media portrayals. Here's some food for thought concerning the concept of love: When we hear of people who say they "hate ______", especially if that blank has no bearing on their personal life, we usually say they are acting ridiculous, are nuts or are making stuff up. For example, "I HATE SUSHI!...Although I've never tried it"....this means the individual THINKS they 'hate sushi'. So what am I getting at? Hate is a figment of one's imagination. The opposite is also true - love is conceived in one's mind, not some metaphysical connection of the heart to another on this small blue planet circling the sun.Do I personally think all is lost when it comes to love? Of course not - I just think the Hollywood, or Bollywood, version is ludicrous. My view is like this: You as an individual have a unique group of characteristics, both physical and mental, that make you, you. There are other people in this world who are similar to you. And since like attracts like, you would probably get along very well with those other people. Your best bet is to get in a relationship with someone like you who falls in that group because at the end of the day you'll feel more enjoyment - and isn't that all that really matters? Forget social conventions, peer pressure, religious pressure, family pressure, media portrayals and just examine whether or not you're happy. All the best!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2012): I think it is possible, just that it's probably not very common. Yet, marriages are very common. Therefore, many or maybe even most marriages do not actually contain this kind of love. So the real problem or mistake is in equating marriage with love. Sure there are some marriages that are based on love but I think there are more that are based on other things. It can be argued that those 'other things' are just as important if not more important than love (such as fulfilling the human need to reproduce, start your own family and not be alone), hence justifying the continuation of the marriage and institution of marriage.
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reader, BondGirl72  +, writes (5 July 2012):
 I am not sure. I thought I was in love once. It looked like love, it felt like love, it seemed to last like love for awhile, and then he stopped talking, stopped being intimate, stopped wanting to be with me, etc. I think people and the idea of love are very fickle. I was happy to love someone I thought was honest, kind, and genuine. I saw this in his behavior everyday until one day I didn't. Turns out, I was wrong about all of it. I don't think I have an overly-romanticized view of love. I think I had and still have a real view of it. Two people who respect one another and want to share their lives while still having their own lives. Two people who would have ups and downs, but who would be willing and committed to making it work their way. I was wrong about that too. Not everyone wants to work on a relationship and sometimes loving someone isn't enough. Yes, I think love does exist, but both people have to have a mature view of it. Some people think they know what love is, but honestly, they have no idea. Because of that, they waste a lot of time and create a lot of confusion in the process.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2012): Love does exist , though finding that one soul mate to share it and the rest of your life with is a challenge. I agree its rarely the way its depicted in movies with love at first sight or the sound of a voice that turns out to belong to the person that miraculously turns out to be the person of someone's dreams lol but love does have its magical moments , just don't expected it to be anything like the movies.
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reader, person12345 +, writes (4 July 2012):
 It's both. Real true love does exist, but the power it has is also exagerrated in movies. Media teaches that love conquers all and it absolutely doesn't. It teaches us that love is worth sacrificing everything for and it isn't (except in the case of sacrificing for our own children). Most importantly It teaches that when you find true love, you will be 100% compatible in every way, never fight, never have to compromise, and never feel sad ever about anything ever when that's absolutely not true.
True love is wonderful, you just have to go into it knowing you're still going to fight, you're going to have things you disagree on, everything won't be perfect and not everything is easy just because you love each other.
For instance my boyfriend has aspergers and we struggle with that a lot, sometimes we fight and make each other cry and yell, but deep down we're still really in love with each other. We still better each others lives in ways we couldn't have even imagined before meeting and all those things we thought were stupid and cheesy on cards and such are actually embarrassingly true.
Just so long as your expectation isn't Disney movie happily ever after, there's no reason you can't find love. Romance movies always end when they finally get together, but you know what, life keeps going and remains complicated and that's OK. Because really that kind of love, where you help each other through the bad and experience difficulty together, that's a deeper love than the perfection in movies could ever portray.
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A
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reader, Xearo  +, writes (4 July 2012):
Love exists between two people the way we want it to happen. It is different from a movie, or novel, because we experience it in a different perspective. The only way it can happen though, is to get out there and make it happen and to make your own love story.
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