A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Good day to all,A girl I know commited suicide. To be honest I am not so upset about the suicide itself or even her death. She had a really really awful life and alot of bad things happen her entire life-from the day she was born. When I first found out I didn't feel surpised, I kind of felt more like - well at least she is in a better place now and no more suffering. But I am Christian, and have been brought up to believe that if someone kills themselves, their soul is doomed to hell and they will never find peace, and they will have eternal suffering 100 times worst than what their life on earth was. There is no one else I can speak to about this as I come from a very very small Christian town so everyone I know pretty much thinks and believes this strongly.This is really really upsetting to me as the idea of her life being so bad, and the idea that now God will only punish her even more...and she will never have rest or peace...I am really struggling with the idea of God being loving and forgiving, yet also being brutal like this especially to someone like her who was suffering so much. I keep wondering if she prayed before she did it and asked for forgiveness and accepted God into her life, and even if she did would it have even made a difference?!I am finding it all very confusing and very upsetting. I just keep seeing her in a place of fire for eternity and it seems too unfair that she has suffered so much in life, and will just continue to suffer in death. Even though I am Christian I would listen from people who are Christian and also non-Christian with a very much open mind.Thanks everyone.
View related questions:
christian Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, agonyunclechris  +, writes (31 August 2008):
 hi firstly. the bible doesnt condem suicide!
also
hi i have an important passage from the bible to show she is forgiven: isiah 43:25 .
i even i. am he that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine own sake,and will not remember thy sins.
this is god talking to the church and he says he forgives our sins because he cant bare to remember the bad things his children have done.
but considering suicide isnt condemned in the bible she should be entering the kingdom of heaven, providing she is baptised... but i cant say because im not god am i.
why dont you pray for her hun. i will put her in my prayers tonight.take care
chris
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2008): All I know is, our God is a fair and just God. If she was a Christian, and had accepted Christ at some point in her life, then i'm sure she's in the right place. After all, God doesn't make mistakes.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2008): Well I strongly believe that God forgives all. I'm sure she is in peace and in a better place...
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2008): I don't know how much help it is, but this is how I feel about it:If God is all-powerful then God gave her that life. God gave her those circumstances that were mostly out of her control. God did a lot to shape her personality, both inside and outside the womb. If God doesn't accept her for the only why she could handle it, then I have no respect for God. I'd rather burn in hell of eternity than worship a piece of sh*t like that, no matter how powerful God might be. I don't care what any human says about her. They're not God, and they have no right to speak for God. I don't trust or respect anyone who thinks they can tell me what God thinks of me better than I can. Same goes for anyone I care about.
...............................
A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta +, writes (30 March 2008):
 If you're talking to God you're praying.
If God talks to you you're skitzophrenic.
i rather like male reader- anonymouses philosphy.
You go to chruch to become closer to god. you do "good" thigns to become closer to god..
does it not say That adam and eve were made in "his" own image. and that eve was made from one of the ribs of adam ( take that David Copperfield! )
So.. geneticly adam and eve would be clones? or brother and sister dare i say?
( Before verses 3-4a )
"Cain and Able were to marry the twin sister of their brother." WTF? they are brothers. theres no mention of a 3rd, unless we're tlaking about them in the thrid person.
"Despite Cain's desire to marry his OWN twin sister Lebuda"
oh and at the end of the movie Cain kills Able.
So as a summary. Incest - Sin, Murder - Sin Coverting another mans wife ( bumping uglies ) - Sin.
Adam proforming a wedding ceremony with out the proper lience - Priceless.
If all this is true then why in such the Early stages of man did god do nothing? i mena.. he was Still talking to them back then anStill he would not do anything..
If all this is True then does that mean i've been having sex with family members all along? because.. thats pretty wrong.
just check my other replies about incest and such
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2008): Hello there,
I am so sorry to hear of your dear sweet friend's demise. I can imagine how upsetting it must be for you, to think that she is suffering, now in her afterlife. It just seems so unfair for this poor girl to have suffered in life only to continue suffering.
I believe that our lord, God forgives all and he opens his arms and loves everyone. I really do. I think he blessed her and took him into his house and she is happy and has found joy with him.
But I cannot tell you to believe that, as I respect your beliefs too. This is what we must do. All I can do is give you my viewpoint on what I think happens, after someone passes on. I hope you can work this through and I wish you the best, in finding some solace and comfort. But I do really, really believe, she is with God and surrounded by his angels. God never turns away the innocent wounded ones and the sad little ones who need his love the most. And this was she. Again, I am so sorry about your friend, may she rest in peace..
Anne
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2008): My philosphy.
If a god requires Worship to get into eternal paradise. Then he isn't worth worshipping.
If it is real (a God has no sex, it is above such petty classifications) then it is all powerful and has no need to be worshipped at all. So I don't.
I refuse to live my life lorded over by rules written up for a society that no longer exists and hasn't existed since the dark ages.
That said. I am an Agnostic if we must label.
I am open to concepts of religion and I agree on the morals of the bible. Deep down its intentions are good. But I cannot reconcile with a God that will slaughter anyone who fails to comply with him. That it the mark of a dictator. I mean God commited Genocide.
If I did that I'd be condemned. But when GOD does it, people praise it.
Everyone has the right to choose how to live their life, and we shouldn't be hampered down by the weight of some existential deity whose existence has yet to be proven.
Flynn 24
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2008): Is it just me or is there not alot of questions comming up about religion/abortion/death God?
I find this so sad that some people live there life like this thinking if they do wrong they will not go to heaven?
At one piont in all our lives we do some wrong some more than others, but does this merit going to hell? I think not.
Also agree with others that everyone in your community thinks this of this poor girl,she clearly was in need and pain and maybe thought that she had no where to turn,we can only imagine what was going through her mind in the lead up to her passing.I aslo don't belive that if we pray and confess all your sins you will be saved, some sins are unforgivable but suicide is not one of them.I am not a catholic , but I do believe in God and afterlife I also belive ther is a living hell for those who commit crimes that are unforgivable, what happens to them when they die, I don't know but in life we have monsters living with us daily when good decent loving people are suffering ad dieing, we just all have to try to do the best we can to live a good life and help others as much as we can. A great example of this is on this site were folk who are struggling and in need recieve help and support from some great aunts/uncles with out judgement, and take the time and effort to really understand and try to ease what the person is going through. I am going on & on poster you don't have to pray for your friend, you are doing her a great honour by thinking of her and I am sure she is at peace now in heaven being cared for & looked after,which unfortunatly for her didn't happen in life.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2008): Once we come to Christ and accept his saving grace God forgives all of our sins: past, present and future. The only sin God says is unforgivable is the rejection of God.
...............................
A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta +, writes (29 March 2008):
My condolences for the loss of your friend.
I've lost many friends over the years too.
I am agnostic.
I dislike orginized religion.
I do not believe in Jesus and i do not believe in God.
As much as i love a good bible bashing sesson, i will not degrade your beliefs as long as people do not try and shove their beliefs down my throat or force it upon me.
If i'm damned to "hell" then bring it on.
If This God fellow Loved his "children", the world would not be in the state it is in. If god is Love. what kid of love was showen to her during her hour of need?
What love was showen to my friend who was raped and abused form a young age?
What love was showen to my uncle who died of cancer leaving behind a young daughter?
What love is showen to the people starving in 3rd world countries?
All children are born innocent, no matter how evil their parents.
How could an all powerful being Love and forgive all and still put an innocent child through such pain.
I don't care how good the afterlife is, i wouldn't want to be apart of it knowening all these things.
No one should be made to suffer like that.
If you were God. with devine powers able to do Anything and beyond infinity.
You have the gift of life and healing.
Would you do nothing but watch?
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2008): I'm so sorry for your loss. A friend of mine in high school killed himself, and it was hard. It's hard to internalize death at that age, and it's unfair.In answer to your question, I am catholic, as was my friend who committed suicide. Catholic dogma is that you can't find peace if you commit suicide, b/c you die committing a sin without ever having a chance to repent.That said, I've never really doubted that alan found peace.In my heart, I believe that God is a loving God who truly suffers when we suffer. I don't know why he can't just make the suffering stop, but I don't believe he wants it to happen. It's just life, and some of us, unfairly, get more than others. And sometimes, unfortunately, the suffering seems to much for one to bear, particularly in youth, when you lack the perspective to believe that things could be better.I think the best thing you can do is to pray for your friend's soul, and to pray for peace for yourself.The dogma of the various churches was created by men, and as good of a guide post as it might be, that's all it is. Trust what you know - trust your faith.Again, I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you and your community are able to find peace.
...............................
A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (29 March 2008):
 Well done Lazy guy you hit the nail on the head. I think some Christians are BLOODY HYPOCRITES and doctrinate a load of BULLSHIT. If the poster was a true Christian as she alleges she would have helped her friend like a "Good Samaritan" and gotten her to see a professional councellor instead of condemning her for what she had done.
This is a very tragic waste of human life, the poor girl must have been beside herself with sadness and desparation to have taken her life like that. I know a young lady who has cancer and comes from a religious family, my friend made my blood boil when he said I quote "God is testing her strength and faith if she prays hard enough he will cure her" I told him that is a terrible thing to say as I am not very religious and think life is there to be lived and not worry about living by what is quoted in the bible.
...............................
A
female
reader, dearkelja +, writes (29 March 2008):
 If your friend asked God to be her savior and asked for forgiveness, then she is in Heaven, finally at peace with the world and finally in the arms of the Divine Creator who is now making all things whole again for your little friend.
I believe that Lazy Guy hit this one good too and that your little Christian Community needs to take a good look inside their own little hearts.
When I was about your age we also had a girl commit suicide and the "Holier than Though" said the same thing. I remember praying to God to accept my this girl in Heaven and I truly believe she is there and maybe only because of the (mine and many, many other) prayers to God to take her.
You take care and it's nice to see a young girl asking these kind of provoking questions. We all have choices (God Bless America) in what we can believe. Believe what is in your heart.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2008): Hi, I am very sorry for the loss of your friend. When someone you care about or even just barely know commits suicide it can tear you down to you very core, it is painful to think that anyone could actually take their own life.
First off, I believe that people who do this really have no excuse, their lives could never be that bleak or horrible that they needed to take such drastic measures. Often times it happens when they have really just had the worst day ever, and because they suffer from a mental illness called clinical depression, their brains are broken, they don't know what else to do they are in emotional and psychological pain. It is quite sad that they did not get the help they needed, or reached out for that help or took it upon themselves to seek medical intervention, or that no one in their family understood their mental illness and tried to get them help.
I don't believe people really understand mental illness in our society and because they don't understand it, they fear it and they believe falsely that God is going to punish this person for being ill enough to commit suicide.
I consider myself a Christian, and I don't believe in a vengeful God. I think her soul will go to heaven, as I believe God will know she is his child.
The people in your community are small minded and do not understand this has everything to do with mental illness and not lack of Godliness and commiting a mortal sin.
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (29 March 2008):
 When a person dies, his soul will either returned to God or the devil snatched it away.
There is a constant war in the spiritual ream between God and the devil.
Those who live for God , their souls will belong to God for
He will not let the devil take those souls.
Those who rejected God , the devil will take them.
I dont believe in your story about that if someone kills
themselves, their soul is doomed to hell and they will never
find peace, and they will have eternal suffering 100 times
worst than what their life on earth was.
These are false teachings and not found in the Bible.
http://bible.com/bibleanswers_result.php?id=228
It is a man made law , probably to discourage suicides.
Whether we will be alive or dead, we will all have to wait
until Judgment day for God to judge each and everyone of us.
Hell is just a temporary place for after the Judgment day ,
there wont be any place called Hell.
Those whose names are in the Book of Life will enter Heaven
and those whose names are not found in the Book of Life will
be cast into the lake of fire.
As a Christian, you are not automatically saved unless you
confess all your sins to God and accept Jesus Christ as
your saviour and believed He is the son of God.
Then your salvation is assured .
This is my Christian belief.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2008): you poor thing. this is the main fallacy of religion hun. i don't believe in god, not just because of the fact that the majority of people whom ever lived would be burning in an eternal hellfire. if what was required throughout all time was believing in jesus, and getting him to "wash your sins away", do you have any idea how many people would be rotting in hell? not because they didn't BELIEVE, they would be because they had NO POSSIBLE WAY to find out about him. think about the millions that have lived and died in china, long before jesus. how were they saved? or the Americas, the native Americans.. how were they saved for thousands of years?the fact is, that it doesn't make sense unless either:1. Christianity is a regional based religion, and like all religions, tries to force compliance by making any sort of belief in anything different punishable (ie hell)in this case, it would simply be false, since it was obviously the idea of people who lived in a certain geographic area, at a certain time. if there was really one true religion, there wouldn't be this much contention.2. there is ANOTHER way to enter heaven, and the bible is incorrect in saying that the only way is through believing in jesus. Since you believe in god, this probably makes the most sense. there must be another way that people are judged, not simply on their belief in jesus, but how they acted in life.3. god is NOT all loving. the bible directly states this. if he were loving, he would have SOME way for people to escape ETERNAL damnation.4. The christian idea of hell is faulty. meaning, that the older views of hell would be more correct. did you know when hell was first penned, it was'nt ETERNAL damnation, but you simply stayed there to "cleanse" yourself of sin? this seems slightly more acceptable.I hope this helped you somehow, you have to realize that life isn't cut and paste from an old book. that book has been changed since its been written. you probably haven't been told that, but the bible has been edited up to about 500 years ago. and there is still debate as to what stories should be kept in it. don't use the bible as literal fact, and i think that will help you with many of your dilemmas.Have a good one hun.
...............................
A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (29 March 2008):
 Doesn't this really tell you all you need to know about these so-called christians?
That they think a person who suffered through life needs to be punished yet more? What kind of god do these people worship anyway?
Oh and what happens to people who didn't do anything to help this girl before it was to late? What a lovely community in which a young girl sees no other way out then suicide.
Isn't it convenient that the 'church' of this community condems the victim and doesn't condemn the community? Why don't you worry about your own sould for having turned your back on someone in need? The bible has far more to say about those kind of people then those who commit suicide. (Read up on it, the bible doesn't conderm suicide directly at any point, only indirectly and in then it conflicts itself)
You face a classic struggle, faced with the real world you are starting to realize that the simplistic views of your religious upbringing just ain't adeqaute anymore. How can you worship a god who would drive a human being to despair, then punsih them with eternal damnation? How can you fit this with a loving merciful god?
Religion ain't a pick&mix, you can't just take those bits you like and ignore the rest. Either you adopt the view of your community or find a different form of fate. This is not easy but the alternative is to bury your head in the sand and become one of those "christians" around you who condemn but do not give aid.
Therefore doth my Father love me, because I lay down my life, that I might take it again. No man taketh it from me, but I lay it down of myself. -- John 10:17-18
...............................
A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (29 March 2008):
 Hi
Im not christian, but i believe god will welcome her no matter how she died. God loves all his children. Im not religeous in anyway to be honest, but i certainly dont think her soul will go to hell. You're right, she will now have peace.
C xxxxx
...............................
|
