A
female
age
30-35,
*wasti
writes:Hi guys,I am here to share a problem that I am going through. My relationship with my boyfriend is going through a very rough patch, and I want to know what exactly should I do in this situation.I am dating this guy and he is my first and always love. Its been 6 years we are together. In the beginning, every thing seemed nice. He was just like the one I had always desired of, loved me so much, I was his priority, he felt my pain, and made me feel like his princess. But since 2 years things seem to have changed. I caught him once sex chatting with a girl on skype. When I asked him the reason, he said he was encouraging her for his friend, that was hard for me to believe. Nevertheless, I forgave him. After that I kind of lost my trust on him. I gave him all that he wanted. We did had sex too.Then why did he needed some other girl when I was there for him. Still now I find him as a great flirt. Has more gal friends than guys wid whom he is very flirty. I try not to be so possesive and leave his life on his own. But since this year, I find him very rude towards me. He shouts at me, disrespect me, ignore me and doesn't even bother to apologise. I keep crying and it has no effect on him. Despite of all these things, I forgive him coz I love him a lot. When he meets me he is very nice, makes me feel that he loves me more than nothing. But over the phone he rejects me like nothng. He is nice only when we sex chat. He relates every thng with that. Obviously I won't like non veg toks all the tym. And if that doesnot happen, then he hardly toks. Now the situation has come that he can't tolerate a mere interference of mine in his life. If I ask him something or the other about what he is going to do, he gets so irritated. I do evrythng that can give him hhappiness. On his birthday, a month ago, I tried to make him as special as I can. I beked his birthday cake, cooked lunch for him, made a lot of handmade cards and gifts, bought him a new headset, took him for dinner in pizza hut. I did every possible thing that would make his day special. And his was a nrmal reaction. He never does anythng on my birthday, doesnt even bring me a birthday cake. I never complain him. I try to adjust with him in every possible way I can. Last sunday when I was leaving home, we had a fight on his coming late coz he already had to leave early. Whatever it was I felt bad that I shouted on him. I said sorry. After reaching home I ordered a bouquet of red roses for him online With a sorry note. When he received, he just said thanks and hang up. Later that day when I tried toking to him, he ignored me. I feel so bad all the time. I don't understand, should I end this relation? Is it always about sex for him? What should I do to get back that essence in our relationship again?
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female
reader, Swasti +, writes (20 May 2015):
Swasti is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks for all your views. I hope I ll b strong enogh to leave him.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2015): Oh, sweetie.Yes, it is time to end this relationship.It was time long ago.I am so sorry. I know you love him. BUT he does not love you back. You can see it in the way he treats you. He treats you like a doormat because he knows you will keep running back to him. Maybe he treated you better in the beginning because he was trying to score you and now that he has you he takes you for granted. I do not think he is capable of a mature relationship as he is very selfish and self centered.Don't run back this time.Run FAR AWAY.You are worth more.Why would you stay with a guy who does not love you, appreciate you and respect you? You will never be happy in a one sided relationship. I know, you keep holding on because you love him. Love conquers all. But it doesn't. Please stop believing he will change or things will get better. He won't. Stop trying to save him. He is not your knight in shining armour. He won't rescue the Princess because he is just not capable of that level of integrity, honour or love and devotion. :(He is using you. Yes probably for sex. He has no use for you unless he is looking for sex. You will probably notice he will pay more attention and say nice things when he is in the mood and then he ignores you and has no use for you.Stand your ground. Tell him it is over. Walk away and don't look back.Time to be strong.You can do better.You will see that the right guy won't make you feel so bad. And he is out there. But you have to set yourself free to make yourself available for him.You have a BIG HEART.Do not waste it on this LOSER!
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A
female
reader, Madalo 1  +, writes (19 May 2015):
oh my goodness can you just read what you wrote? what kind of relationship is this? You are a doormat and you are being abused! you're obviously not happy in this relationship. He doesn't respect you. You need to have dignity. He may have been that sweet guy in the beginning but he no longer is, and he doesn't value you much. You need to be strong and move on. mind you, abusers always want to keep you in their hold. when he notices you're contemplating leaving him, he will become "sweet" again but that doesn't mean he's repentant of his actions; he just wants you to remain in his grip. you're young, 21 at most. don't give up on love yet: you can find someone worthy of your love and attention. dump this bastard honestly before he completely ruins your life.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2015): It sounds like you really like your boyfriend, but he does not seem to really like you much. It seems that he just uses you for sex and any gifts or affection you want to give, but he doesn't even appreciate those things from you. He is cheating on you with a bunch of other girls he finds online!You are so young, and 6 years is a long time to be with someone at your age. I would recommend you take some time out from this relationship. You are doing all the work here. Go on strike. Stop talking with him, having sex with him, or making plans, giving gifts, anything. Then see if he even misses these things you do at all. I expect he will call you for sex, but will not mention anything else since he does not care about you as a person. Just your vagina. I think you can do much better. Look for a new boyfriend who will appreciate your affection and reciprocate as well. One who will remember and celebrate your birthdays. You deserve to be treated as well as you treat others. Yes, it will hurt but not for as long as you think, trust me. You will be over this guy pretty soon. Best wishes!
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