A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Can a man really love two women? I'm in love with two women and don't know which to choose, its hard one is my baby's-mother. I'm so confused!
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female
reader, IAMDONE  +, writes (25 February 2011):
There are so many reasons why we fall in love and love someone. Personally, I believe that loving more than one person is very well possible. It is a situation where someone gets hurt. You many not have to make a decision between the two of them...one of them may make a decision about you!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2011): i am currently in love with two men one is my husband one is a friend that i call my "boyfriend".... in a perfect world I would have both of them.... neither of them is happy about sharing me (yes they both know each other and that I'm with the other)....
yes I believe folks can love two people at once
unless you and the two women are able to work out a poly relationship you should not make any decisions until you are sure
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2011): In a perfect world, it would be the right thing to do to choose your baby's mother. I don't think you can love two women at once. Love grows from life experiences with that person and how deeply you know them. Maybe you are in love with one and have a strong physical attraction to the other? I don't think you can have the same level of attraction to both at once, though. Are you maybe dealing with love versus lust? Should you stick with the one you are with because you have been with them for a long time and they are your baby's mother or should you explore the woman who is giving you butterflies, that if you got to know her better you could possibly love her?
I think that if you have have feelings for both, you are definitely in a tough spot. You have to figure out which one will make you happier.
Are you already living with one of them as your wife or common law wife? It is not fair to her in this case if you continue being with her when your heart is with someone else. If you continue to have strong feelings for another woman other than your wife or baby's mother, you should look at what is going wrong in your primary relationship. Maybe it isn't working. Maybe you would be better off with the other woman. Maybe she is the one you were meant to be with. You can't choose the baby's mother if you do not love her with all your heart or are in love with someone else at the same time. You need to figure this out instead of stringing two other women along. Someone is bound to get hurt and a child is involved so this decision is not to be taken lightly. Whatever your decision is, you must go with your heart, not because you are afraid.
You need to decide what you want without either of them in the picture. Maybe you need to get away from both of them for awhile and really think about it.
Do these women feel the same way about you? Are they both available to be with you?
Which one do you think about more? Which one is always on your mind? Which one do you look forward to seeing and talking to? Do you miss one of them more when you are not with them? Do you fantasize more about one of them? Does it hurt deep in your gut when you think about living without one of them? Ask yourself these questions and really be honest about what you are feeling.
Life is too short to be unhappy. You need to make a choice to fully committ to one relationship or start another one. There is no in between. It isn't fair to string the other one along if you aren't willing to be with her and only her. It will be hard either way because you will have to distance yourself from one of them and it will hurt them but there is no other way when you have made your choice.
Good luck.
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (24 February 2011):
 Sure, I think a person can love lots of people. I love my parents, my brother, some of my friends...
If you're trying to choose, I'd choose your baby's mother. Don't you love your baby too? As a package deal, they should trump anything else.
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A
male
reader, firstlovelastlove  +, writes (24 February 2011):
 "Is it possible to love two women?" What does "love" mean to you? For me I cannot "love" two women. If I were you I'd make a mental list about what it means to "love" woman A and woman O (a for apple o for oranges, no 2 women are the same). You should have different things on each list. To me, the way a woman handles adversity goes a long way in knowing who I want to be with. I hope this helps!
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