A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I'm wondering if it's possible to have a relationship after a one-night stand. Basically, I got with a guy over a month ago in a nightclub and we exchanged numbers then we were texting pretty much every other day and he wanted to meet up and suggested cinema but we never got round to it and now and again he would invite me to a party he's at or to go round his...which I declined. I was debating going round his one night but I thought, no I'm not sleeping with him before we go on a date so i told him that I would meet him but not at his house and he was fine with that. THEN. Coincidently I saw him out in the same nightclub as me and we danced, kissed and he invited me back to his. I said yes as I wanted to be with him and he asked me about previous relationships etc on the way to his. After we slept together, he was so cute, kissing me in the night as I slept or when i turned over and woke up slightly... so cute that it didnt seem like a one-night stand and he wanted cuddles in the morning and wanted me to call in sick at work. He then asked me what I wanted from this. I returned his question before answering and he said he wants to see me again or if i wanted it could be casual but he said he didnt want it to be a 'one-night thing'. He suggested cinema 'in a couple of weeks'. Since then we've been texting more and he said again that he wants to see me and I'm going on a date with him this weekend so a week earlier than suggested. So... what happens now? How long until we're 'boyfriend and girlfriend'? and how do I get to that stage? We both know we like eachother... we just want to see eachother again as we already know lots about eachother through conversations in person and by text.
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at work, exchanged numbers, kissing, one night stand, text Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, zorb21 +, writes (30 August 2013):
The ugly truth is, most guys would never go for a girl who has one night stands..
If you do it with them, whats stopping you from doing it with someone else? It's just asking for us to be paranoid!
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (5 July 2013):
OP asks: "How long until we're 'boyfriend and girlfriend'?"
sadly probably NEVER going to happen.
you gave him the entire candy store before he had to pay for it honey...
you are now probably forever relegated to friends with benefits.
the ONLY hope you have to save this is to go no contact..
do not call him
do not text him
do not stalk him on social media.
pretend he does not exist.
if it takes more than a week for him to contact you and he does it late at night "hey what's up?" texts after 9 pm mean he's looking for a booty call... then you know... NOTHING.
btw if he texts you at night... do not answer him right away... let him stew till morning. "oh sorry did not see this text till this morning...hope you had a good evening"
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A
male
reader, mkateko +, writes (4 July 2013):
Hi
To me it doesn't seems like it is a one night stand, usually a one night stand it doesn't have a constand contact such as you guys has like you are saying.
One night stand we meet on the night, no contact, no string attached then yours is defferent. I do understand it wasn't formally agreed to be a relationship, forget not that relationship is neither formal nor causual, so how, and where you meet, or how you started your relationship it doesn't matter.
I am sorry, to me you are on a relationship, is just that there is just few thing to be ironed up. Not i am sorry that wasn't a one night stand.
Thank you
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2013): Ohhhh becareful. It may never be boyfriend and girlfriend. Might be f*** buddies. And yes they do cuddle and hang out during the day.
Just hear what he is actually saying to you. He doesn't want just one night but he also clearly says he doesnt want commitment.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (4 July 2013):
That is determined by his attitude towards relationships, his availability to you and your compatibility together. It goes both ways. It's great if he's trying to get to know you at the same time. You are also figuring out if he would a good boyfriend for you. It's still very early and you have great chemistry to start with. Everyone still somewhat divide people into casual and serious types. As you get to know each other more you can let him know that you are fun to be with but also is able to be serious and loyal with the right person.
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