A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Is is ok to be with your 1st cousin ? i live somewhere where it is legal, but is it really acceptable in todays society, please give me your honest opinion. Thankyou.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2008): I know I am late and I do not know if you will read this but you are not alone. My 1st cousin and I are madly in love. We live together and want to get married. OUr family suspects us but does not know for sure yet. We are nervous and with time we will bring it to our family. Good luck
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2008): He's in the UK where it's legal and the church accepts it and where it's not considered incest or a felony or whatever they call it where you are.
The US laws were generally made in the 1800's when there was less information available than now. In the US it was illegal in some places to have interracial marriages in the 1950's and people went to jail for it. Those laws were repealed in the 1960's. I suppose it's only a matter of time for the current laws in some states to be repealed.
No, I don't take your comments personally, but like you say, we've all got our own opinions, and I don't have anything to 'get over'!.
I think I'll just leave it at that, and he can make his own mind up and form his own opinions on the matter.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2008): http://cousincouples.com/?page=facts
http://cousincouples.com/?page=religion
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2008): Unusually, Peoriaman is talking out of his backside.
It IS legal in most states of the USA. You only have to do a quick Google search to find out which states have restrictions and what those restrictions are. The majority of states allow it without conditions - 29 in all - others have certain conditions attached, mostly in regard to the likelihood of there being children born from such a union.
Phil
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (9 January 2008):
 First, if it is legal where you are, then you are OK.
Next, there will ALWAYS be people that can not handle something about another's relationships. Whether it is 1st cousins, a sexual fetish, inter-racial, inter-faith, open relationships, there is stigma to everything for at least some people out there.
In any relationship you will be expected to be strong enough to battle the nay sayers that will try to break you up.
The only other thing you MUST be ready for is that because it is your cousin, if things do not work out, you will have to continue to deal with her, always seeing her at family functions. (weddings, funerals, etc...). THAT is the real challenge of dating family.
The rule I suggest is: Do not do it, unless you are 100% sure it will lead to marriage. Otherwise, the family strife it will cause will make you a target for all the family drama.
-Frank B Kermit
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A
female
reader, dollparts +, writes (9 January 2008):
 Well I mean it's legal right? If you happy man that's all that matters :) I know some one who married their first cousin and people don't care about that right? like the other guys said it's perfectly acceptable. HOpe this helps :)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2008): Growing up as a child I always had a huge crush on my first cousin. I didn't know better at the time, and my mom would tell me it was wrong to have feelings for him that way. Either way it does not change the fact you're still blood kin, it does screw over the genetics of your family, makes you a shock in the community if the word leaks, and, of course, would be considered unacceptable to many, but if you both accept it and love one another-embrace it, there's nothing wrong with that. If I could turn back the hands of time I would've married my first cousin because I've always been very attracted to him.
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A
female
reader, leyan  +, writes (9 January 2008):
 Hi,
There is nothing wrong about it, but you do have to think of genetics, as your children, will have more chances of not being very healthy than if you were not related, I am talking of experience, I married my first cousin, we have 2 beautiful children, but the youngest (the one in the photo with me) has Epilesy with severe learning, physical and intellectual dissabilities, both our families, do not have Epilepsy, but who knows about older generations and my daughter got it through the genes.
I am not saying all related marriages will end up with disabled children, but risks are higher.
Good luck.
P.S. my husband and I are seperated now.
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A
male
reader, jm81690 +, writes (8 January 2008):
 People are bound to poke fun, but people are small minded, so who cares?
If you love your cousin, if it's legal, go for it!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2008): Guillaume - The church's position in the UK is that there is no bar to cousin relationships or marriage.
The only country that has any restrictions at all in the western world is the USA - 29 states allow it, the rest have certain conditions attached. So the majority allow it.
Phil
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (8 January 2008):
 Yes i think its acceptable, but if you feel its going to cause rifts and upset in your family then probably best to give it a miss, otherwise go for it.
Good luck
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A
female
reader, Norex  +, writes (8 January 2008):
 yes it's acceptable and nothing wrong in it at all.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2008): Yes, it's perfectly acceptable.
Einstein, Darwin and Roosevelt all married their cousins. It's likely that Joseph and Mary were first cousins.
Phil
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