A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend has started using Viagra to have sex with me, in the beginning we used to have sex all the time and there was no problem and now he feels the need to take it every time. Is this because he's not attracted to me anymore?
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHow did you manage to stop yourself thinking u need it? I try to encourage it but I'm not sure if me saying it just makes it worse?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2011): He may feel insecure of his performance for some reason, and has become a bit dependent on Viagra. I had a similar problem. I was on the dating scene for the first time in many years, and was not skilled with many women. So, I had performance issues with some women, and got a prescription for Levitra to help. It did, but it took me a while to wean myself off the psychological dependency of it.
FOr the record, it isn't an urban myth entirely. If you do not have physically induced ED, (meaning you have no problems getting erections or you have psychologically induced ED from stress or anxiety) these meds can and do make you obscenely erect and for a long time. However, they do not increase the natural desire, horniness or urges that lead to good sex or orgasm, and in many cases I found it harder to orgasm when using it. And it is true you have to be in the mood and excited sexually for them to work. In any case, they are not needed except for medically diagnosed cases, and I discourage them for "casual" use.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe is 36 so a bit older than me. He says he wants to guarantee that its good and I have tried telling him that I don't like it as it really doesn't bother me if it doesn't last ages. Before we used to have sex several times a day and it was no problem (not every day) but now I'm probably lucky to get it once in a few days with the assistance of Viagra. I think its physocolgical but not really sure how to get him to realise he doesn't need to. Im sure in the long term it can't be healthy to take it and now I find myself wondering each time we have sex if he has taken it.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (26 February 2011):
I think he needs to see his doctor more then take Viagra if he is in his 20's.
I don't think that is normal at all. Men in their 20's are like rabbits.. (no offense to any of them ;) )
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A
male
reader, ClearEyes +, writes (25 February 2011):
There's an urban legend going around where I live that Viagra gives you the largest, longest lasting and hardest possible erection that your body can sustain, essentially maximizing your physical performance. Being at least a little bit educated, I called that as bullshit, but maybe your bf believed it.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (25 February 2011):
Like I said before, Viagra DOES NOT influence a guy's sex drive, it merely helps to sustain the erection. The desire and motivation has to be there first or the results are nill.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2011): No, he's probably still attracted to you, but he's become dependant on the Viagra to perform. It might be a physical dependancy or it might be completely psychological, but I doubt it has anything to do with you.
Younger men sometimes take Viagra (even though they don't really need it) because it can increase stamina and they believe it makes them perform better.
I don't want to call him your boyfriend a Viagra addict, but it sounds like he's insecure about his performance and that's why he feels he needs to keep taking it. Perhaps tell him it bothers you? I wouldn't blame yourself.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2011): He is probably under the wrong impression it will make him perform better. Guys are taking these sometimes without cause,believing they will be a better lover. It wont be about how attractive you are.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2011): A lot of men lose their sex drive at a young age my husband did he also take Viagra maybe u should try different things in the bedroom spice it up maybe put on a sexy outfit that usually works don't be hard on urself talk to him about see what he has to say it might help
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (25 February 2011):
How old is your boyfriend? If he is around your age it's mighty strange he would need Viagra at such a young age. He isn't ill or have some other mediical condition? And by the way Viagra doesn't CAUSE erections, it just helps to sustain them.
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