A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello everyone. So... my husband is often abroad for work. I lost my mom to cancer a couple of years ago. Since day 1 I've bonded with my mother in law whom I consider like a mother and a best friend. So, while my husband is abroad I often (say, once or a week) hang out with her (she lives in my city, walking distance from my house) and we have a really great time together. I'm 31, she's 54: we are both teachers, have the same major and share a many interests. Anyway, the other day I was chatting with a very good girl friend of mine who said it's not "normal" to be so close to your mother in law. She said it's ok to be friendly, but you're not supposed to be this close and to consider her as a friend. She told that with her own MIL she's in good terms, but she'd never dream of hanging out with her as that would be "creepy". Is it? Do you think my relationship with my MIL is creepy? What kind of relationship do you have with your MIL? Is it normal to be so close to your MIL?
View related questions:
best friend Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Stayc63088  +, writes (29 August 2012):
 I agree with eyeswideopen that she seems a bit jealous. There is nothing creepy about being close to your mother in law. Doesn't make much sense how it could be creepy... Or that there is a law that says you can only be civil to in laws. I think it's sweet you get along so well. I like my MIL but I don't think we have enough in common to hang out as we would run out of things to chat about.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (29 August 2012):
 Maybe your friend is a tad jealous of your friendship with the MIL? My mother-in-law died in 1984 and I miss her to this day.
...............................
A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (29 August 2012):
Always view with some scepticism anyone who claims to know what “normal” is. What your friend is doing, is assuming that everyone else has, or ought to have, the same kind of relationship with their in-laws as she does. It’s great that you get on so well with your mother in-law: great for both of you, and equally so for your husband to know that you are looking out for each other whilst he is away. Don’t worry about it, this is not abnormal or undesirable. It’s a good thing.
I wish you all the very best.
...............................
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (29 August 2012):
 No not at all. Sounds really nice. I'm not married but I'm very close with my partner's parents. We don't live near each other, but we send emails back and forth frequently and send each other amusing things we've seen online.
Why would there be something wrong with bonding with your MIL? She's family.
...............................
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (29 August 2012):
 sounds lovely to me. my last MIL was only 8 years older than I am and we were great friends.
I'm 52 and one of my best friends is 32 she has a new baby and I call her my "quasi grandbaby"....
I don't think it's creepy at all... I think your friend has some skewed ideas of what's creepy...
friendships know no boundaries... age or relationship wise.
you are normal.
your friend is just opinionated in the wrong direction.
...............................
|
