A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Can someone please tell me what has religion got to do with marriage??I'm indian and I find it so wierd in my community people see this religion as an important factor its ridiculous..My cousin whose hindu liked this muslim guy they dint get married cuz he is 'muslim'..I don't know if my parents would do the same to me if I liked someone from another religion..I think its just being unreasonable..And here in my community people are proud that their daughters had arranged marriage,like WTF!why?can't she love and pick the man of her choice..!what's with these old values and traditions!!sooo annoying!!What are your thoughts?how would u deal in a situation like this?
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 August 2012): I dates someone from another religion and he was my first love. He left me to have an arranged marriage to a woman of the same religion.
I had to have an arranged marriage too because "it has to be done" I was pressured then threatened and then I gave in. I was married to a man. I never saw him or spoke to him until after the wedding. When I saw him I was so disappointed. He was not my type at all. It was like living with a stranger. I could not love him and he left me after 5 months. We got divorced 2 years later.
I met my current boyfriend 3 years ago. We are the same religion but cannot marry because we are not the same caste. I'm expected to give up my house, my job and move into his home to look after his ailing mother.
Religion is important to some people. Tradition is important to some people. Caste is important to some people. I thought love was important...I was wrong.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 August 2012): Islamically, women are allowed to choose their spouses. Its not allowed to foce anyone into marriage, specially women.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (29 August 2012):
 If I was religious and it mattered to me, then yes religion matters. I am not religious... most of my friends are not either... if you are religious then you care and you tend to hang out with other religious folks...
the old saying is "water seeks it's own level" or "birds of a feather flock together"
my GF and I are both Jewish and engaged to men who were raised Catholic. NONE of us are practicing our religions.
My GF and I tried to explain to our fiances that IF we were members of a synagogue we would not be with them.... it's that important if you are a practicing Jew.....
If you are not happy with your parents lifestyle and choices, then at your age it's time to move on and move out and live your life for you.
As for arranged marriages... I know of some that are as closed to arranged as you can get and they have lasted longer than many of the love matches I know...
my current fiance and I are engaged... we care deeply... even love each other but we are getting married more because it makes sense to us... we won't be alone, we have combined funds, we have similar interests in hobbies and agree on how to run a home... makes sense to us... and I bet this marriage lasts the longest out of all of my marriages...
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