A
female
age
36-40,
*ashionista20
writes:Is it normal that I am 20 and still a virgin?All my friends have been in serious relationships, however, I have not. I have been on a few dates but I have never felt attrated to anyone. My friends say im picky but I dont want to hurt anyones feelings or end up being hurt myself. I find it hard to trust people as I have been hurt emotionally before but through different circumstances. I believe trust is important in a relationship, however its preventing me from getting close to any guy.
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female
reader, littlemissalf123  +, writes (30 November 2008):
 People would tell me I'm picky, however, I've just come to realize I have HIGH STANDARDS. Your right, you should wait until you find a guy who's suitable for you. Plus at 20 I think you shouldn't really feel rushed to have sex and lose your virginity, I mean it say something if your "TOO PINKY". I says that you have your best interest in mind, and don't want to take part in events that could damage your body and future. And with rate of sexually transmitted diseases going up like a new Nasa Rocket, I wouldn't be so quick to just hop in bed with a guy I met through the friend of a friend of a cousin's friend at a bar.
A
female
reader, babyphat1395 +, writes (29 November 2008):
 this is completely normal, but sooner or later you will have to trust someone.
only you will be able to know what is really right for you, i cant say any specific thing as much as any other person really.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2008): I'm 24 and still a virgin, and pleased to be so. Sometimes I feel as though I'm the odd one in the crowd, and like you I have been hurt in the past and struggle emotionally when it comes to guys. But each time I get that feeling, I remind myself that I would rather be a virgin than give it away to someone who doesn't care. I have so many friends who say they envy my position because they rushed through it. I'm not talking about waiting till marriage or even the one, but I want to wait until I meet someone who repects me and I them, and let it happen naturally. Don't worry, when you meet the right person, you will be able to open up, and they will give you time to do so.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2008): Sooner or later...you are going to have to let your guard down and trust! Severe distrust can be harmful to you and to others, just as much as being too trustful.
If you feel that your lack of trust is effecting your life in a negative way, perhaps a professional can help.
I trust people until they give me a reason not to trust them. And once that trust is broken, it's difficult to trust that person again. But I don't judge everyone by that one person. Everyone is an individual. Just because Person#1 brooved untrustworthy, doesn't mean Person#2 should not be trusted!
As far as your "pickiness," You are young enough to be picky! You know what you want in a relationship, and you're not going to settle! That's Good! If, when you are in your 30s, you are STILL a virgin...I would re-evaluate and probably lower my standards!!
If you are looking for a perfect Man, he doesn't exist! Nor does the perfect woman! Healthy relationships survive inspite of our imperfections.
Good Luck
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A
female
reader, Shonababes +, writes (28 November 2008):
This is normal.You may still be waiting for that right person and their is nothing wrong with waiting tht long. Just because your friends have doesn't mean you hae too. Dont rush with having sex just because your friends have you may regret it.Good Luck x
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