A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been married for 10 years and recently separated from my husband. I asked him for some space and he asked me for a divorce. I found out that after only a week he has had sex with another woman whom he hardly knows. He said that it was his way of getting over me. I find it hard to believe he wasn't cheating on me when we were together. Is it normal for a man to move on so quickly?
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divorce, move on, sex with another Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2009): When my first wife and I split, it was 6 months before I dated someone or had sex with someone. My wife, on the other hand, had sex with a guy she just met the night after she left her first husband. Perhaps the difference was that my first wife left me and I still wanted to be with her, while my wife's first husband cheated on her and she had wanted to leave him for months and was ready to move on for probably 6 months. She never cheated on him and my first wife and I never cheated either.
Some people move on immediately, some take months or longer and some move on before they even left. I don't think it matters if it a man or a women. Both sexes do it differently, depending on how they deal with a relationship failure and the various circumstances. To make a generalization about either sex is just ridiculous.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (23 September 2009):
I'm afraid so. This is the classic male response. He's moving on, so you should to. That doens't mean rushing into anything with another guy. It just means that when you're ready, ring up your female friends and go and have fun. Another guy will come along. Lots of luck. x
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (23 September 2009):
 Yes, men are capable of moving on quickly... they dont think with their hearts!!
He made it quite clear that he wanted a divorce so you need to now move on with your life and forget about him and whichever women he is sleeping with.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2009): I was with my ex-wife for nearly 7 years, she left me the day prior to our 7th year anniversary. Although I was with her for about 10 years or so. So also told me she needed her space so she can think and evaluate our relationship while she has a so-called guy friends that she shares everything with, including a checking account and his bed. But according to her nothing sexually ever happens. Let me remind you, we already have two kids while she decided to "Evaluate" our relationship.My only thoughts was she wanted to have fun with this guy because he wanted to go out and club, travel with her using my money. I guess it brought back the youth she missed while she was with me. Or perhaps she wanted to see if her relationship with him would be better and more fulfilling which would make her final decision easier with whom to be with. Even though I loved her dearly, I couldn’t sit back and watch the mother of my child have her space to explore new love while I sit at home and pray she comes out of her insanity and come back home. So I went and found another woman, learned to love her the way I love my ex-wife, and using my lesson learned from my past mistakes with my ex-wife to better my relationship with my new wife. Now I'm re-married and my ex-wife is still living with this so-called guy friend in a 3 bed room apartment along with his so-called sister which isn't because his only sister is married to a rich guy. Adding two and two together she's basically sharing him with another woman. I guess some women would rather share a man they truly love and care about because they’re blinded by their emotion as my ex-wife currently is. She doesn’t even refer to him as her boyfriend or anything related to being a couple with this guy, yet she still shares his bed after the other woman has.It's hard to justify anyone's motive or action until it finally happens to you. I can honestly say I didn't want to be alone since I was so used to having someone next to me to share my life with and then all of a sudden it's gone. As for myself, I needed to fill the void she left behind when she decided for us and our kids. Her decision decided our fate, my decision sealed it.
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A
female
reader, sunnycomet  +, writes (23 September 2009):
 Yes, if he really doesn't love you and wasn't happy.
Don't worry about it and don't let it bother you. He made it clear he doesn't want you anymore and it is time for you to move on.
I hope you find someone who makes you happy.
Good Luck!
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