A
male
age
30-35,
*imslim75
writes:Lost my virginity last nite. I could not sustain an erection while inside her. i felt as though the condom started to slip at times due to this. I may have been the virgin in the situation, but she wasn't much for foreplay (wouldn't let me go down, wouldn't give any) and had to be home before a certain time. I was thrusting my oatmeal member for about 10 min, trying a couple different positions, but kept goin soft. I have had experience in most things except sex.. Was this my fault because i couldn't maintain? and what should i do to fix this?btw- I was totally up for waaay more foreplay to get in the mood.. seems like they do a lot in the movies before they go at it.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, hijacked_dignity +, writes (28 June 2009):
 Forget about the movies. You have to do what makes you and your partner feel good. It's totally not your fault, and I'm sure the entire time factor made you really nervous. Sex isn't that great if you have to be done in a certain amount of time. Then it feels rushed and you get nervous because you have to time things just right to be done and over with in ten minutes. Plus the fact you had a condom constantly getting looser due to your getting soft probably didn't feel too comfortable. All this added to the fact that you were probably nervous because it was your first time, it's probably to be expected. So I would try again next time and take things slow, on a day where you have more than ten minutes to mess around. Things will go a lot better.
A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (28 June 2009):
 No, not your fault that you were having a "hard" time staying hard. This sounds more circumstantial, plus the fact that "losing virginity" is a bit of an ordeal to begin with. It sounds like you just need another opportunity, and preferably with a better and more agreeable partner. Don't worry about it and move on, you'll be fine.
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