A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: When my boyfriend goes out he just doesn't bother to text me or anything, it seems he ignores me, he said he'd change after he didn't text me all night the other night... thing is, he doesn't even understand how it feels because I never go out.I don't know whether I'm blowing it out of proportion. What do I do?
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female
reader, chigirl +, writes (15 May 2010):
He's out and busy. He's with friends. Why do you need him to smother you and contact you all the time? I've never contacted my boyfriends when I went out on town, and they didn't have a habit of contacting me either. So no contact to me sounds quite normal. Why don't you go out with him? Try and understand that while he is out and busy and having fun with friends, he is having a great time! I suspect that maybe because you are home alone you are bored, alone, not having fun, and want him to entertain you by sending messages.
Try and not sit up waiting by the phone. Go to sleep, have fun with your own friends, or get busy.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2010): Yes..you are blowing things out of porportion. Why does your bf need to text you everytime he goes out? You come across as keeping tabs on him like a parent of some sort. Also, it doesn't appear that you trust him because, if you did, you wouldn't be so consumed with him texting you when he goes out. Moreover, do you have activities that you like to do? If the answer is no, then I say you need to find things you enjoy doing...I find that when people have their own lives and don't make the relationship their primary focus, the fair much better. Find your own passions in live and let this young man live and enjoy his time going out. Stop nagging him about texting you....you are going to annoy him to the point of pushing him away.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (14 May 2010):
The problem is that when he goes out, he can't be texting you all the time. It's not that he ignores you. It's just that he's out with friends and his focus is on them. He can't be out with his friends but be texting you. I'm sure he does't understand. But you not going out is partly the problem here. It would help if you went out more yourself with friends. Or when he's out, just have an evening in and spoil yourself. But don't sit there by the phone waiting for him to text. You don't want to appear like a clingy girlfriend. When he's out with friends, he doesn't text you because he's ignored you or forgotten you. He's not texting because he's just out.
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