A
female
age
30-35,
*ulieH123
writes:I started seeing this new guy, he's sweet , makes me laugh, tests me amazing , he's a hard worker and friendly to everyone but he is a recovering drug addict. He moved to my town three years ago and everyone that met him liked him right away. He really stepped up and made a great life for himself here, he volunteers on our local fire department and the recreation department, he is the first person to offer a helping hand when ever it's needed. When we started seeing each other he told me about his last because he didn't want to have any secrets. He said because of his addiction he lost alt of his family and friends. He said he was ashamed of the person that drugs made him and after five years he went to rehab after almost dying from an overdose. He said he was clean for a year when he moved here so he's been clean four year total. He said he was afraid he would get back into drugs if he was around the people from his past is he packed up and just drove until he found a small town he liked. My parents and my friends think I'm crazy to even consider dating him because of his past. I feel like they are judging him Only by something he told them and not for the person he has become. They liked him before he was honest and opened up about his past . Should I give him a chance
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (14 March 2017):
 Yes you should. Four years is a major achievement and he is not who he used to be. None off us are perfect and if we where all judged by our past then most off us would be lonely. Give him a chance he deserves it.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (6 March 2017):
 I would give him a chance...4 years of recovery is worth something.
My husband is an alcoholic when we met he was an active alcoholic. he's been sober 2 years now and it's been worth every step of the struggle.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2017): First, well done to him. Please tell him that from me. The fact he moved away from his past shows his intention to make it work. The fact he's been honest with you from the start shows his respect for you. And good on you for giving him the chance. It's too easy to run at the first sign of a troubled past.Drugs make a person very different, and good people can do bad things when they become addicted. There's nothing wrong with judging him for his past actions. But at the same time, everyone should be judging him for what he is doing about it.It's understandable why your family and friends are worried, though. They are looking out for you. Only time will convince them, so don't go pushing them to come to your way of thinking, let them get there by themselves. Maybe talk with them about their worries, listen to what they say. And at the same time tell them why you like him and why you think it's all ok. But tell them that you know why they are concerned and ask for their help in helping him. I'm sure they're not going to be unkind to him, but still- keeping clean is a daily struggle, he needs all the support he can get. Don't tell them out-right that they are wrong, don't tell them you are right- this could only polarise their feelings. He should be very proud of what he's achieved, and I know he knows he's lucky to have met you. I wish you both the best of luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2017): You should give him a chance. Ask yourself if you have anything to lose if anything does go wrong - fingers crossed it doesn't. As for your family and friends thinking you're crazy - do your best to push those views to the back of your mind, at the end of the day you're the one dating him! Try and prove them wrong by showing them how much of a good guy he sounds. He sounds like a good guy and you should deffo give it a try.
Hope it works out for you.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  +, writes (4 March 2017):
 Absolutely. He messed up in the past but had the strength to clean up his act, remove himself from temptation and start all over.
He didn't need to tell you about his past but he trusted you enough to tell you. I think you should repay that trust by giving him a chance.
He sounds like a good bloke who made mistakes. He should not be defined by those mistakes if he has turned his life around.
Good luck. I hope it works out for you both.
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